Post # 1
Hi bees! I’m recently married and have been talking with my hubby about eventually having children within the next few years. We both have full time jobs and make decent money atm. We have talked about me being a Stay-At-Home Mom. I’m curious about other bees incomes are just on one salary.
I’m worried that the idea of being a Stay-At-Home Mom like we discussed may not be in the cards for us financially.
With that being said- I just have few questions for the Stay-At-Home Mom 🙂
How big is your family?
Did you struggle the first year?
How much did you end up making on one salary?
What is your location?
Did you have to compromise on something you loved/loved doing?
Thanks bees any extra input would be helpful also for someone just staring a TTC journey.
Post # 2
I’m not a Stay-At-Home Mom yet, but I’ve been a Stay-At-Home Wife for a few years and it’s worked out well for us. We are expecting twins by the end of this month, so it’ll be us and our two children. Since we’re already budgeted for one income, there’s no real adjustment period for us. We live in a fairly inexpensive area (Charlotte, NC) with very little debt (no student loans, car loans, etc) and have already purchased a home, have emergency savings, max out our retirement savings, etc. In addition, most of my hobbies actually save us money (i.e. crafting, cooking, gardening), so I haven’t really had to give up anything in order to have this lifestyle; however, someone with different interests (i.e. travel, fashion, etc) may find it more restrictive.
Post # 3
foreverlovex: I am not a Stay-At-Home Mom, but I was a single mom for 4 years. I can tell you that kids are expensive. I don’t know where you live, but if you want your kids in any activities at all, I think it would be hard to do it on much less than 6 figures. I just wrote a check for gymnastics for $250 last night for my daughter. Her dance is $66 a month for 1 time a week. Plus you have to buy shoes, costumes, and regular lesson clothes. My son’s activities are also expensive. If you want to save for retirement and college and take occasional vacations and have a decent house and you want your kids to have activities, I’d think it would be hard to do it on much less than $80-$100K in most areas.
Post # 4
Education and activities are things to consider. My son goes to a private catholic school and that’s 400 a month. I just paid his football fees and that was $250 to start and then all his equipment which was another $200, not to mention book fees for school, and his fall baseball practices. It’s a choice to keep him involved like I do and in the school he is in, but without making a good living the way i do, I don’t know that I would be able to do it. I make an above average salary for my field and my area so I’m incredibly lucky. Sure this month was more than I usually pay but the point is that I would be far more limited with my school choices and how much I could have him in if I made less. So I would take into consideration what kind of schools you all would want your kids in and how involved in activities you plan to be.
for the record, my one income is around $82,000 a year. that gives me a house, a car, private school, and year round sports for my son. We take one vacation a year and live pretty comfortably. We do shop on a budget but we aren’t fancy with our clothes and things. My money goes towards bigger stuff. So it’s all about what your priorities are I guess.
Post # 5
foreverlovex: We are in the suburbs of NYC so it isn’t cheap. I’m home with my Dirty Delete right now and we have another set to arrive at the end of the month or early September. We have a beautiful home that we built 4 years ago, 2 cars, retirement savings and an emergency fund.
What we did was pretend I had already stopped working before I had. For 2 years whike I worked we lived off of his salary and banked 100% of mine. So we have 2 years of my salary socked away in an account that we aren’t touching. We were able to live comfortably off of my husbands salary and still have the extras and put into savings. My husband makes an excellent salary but I won’t give specifics. I think it varies a lot on where you live. We couldn’t live this lifestyle on under 6 figures but many people can in other areas of the country.
I plan to work part time when my kids are in school and will probably use all of that money to support their activities and save the rest.
We haven’t had to make any compromises and at this time we plan to be a family of 4. There’s a good chance baby fever might hit in another 3-4 years and we become 5 though. Who knows!
Post # 6
Mrs.Sawyertobe: 70% of households have a total income of less than $80k, 80% make less than 100k , regardless of whether that income is coming from one person or both.
It is extremely possible to easily live on one salaary of significantly less than 80-100k. In the vast majority of this country you can live comfortably on a 50k household income, including owning a house, and contributing to your retirement, while still paying for children’s activities.
Post # 7
MakingHerWait: I don’t agree. I have a friend who stays at home on about %60K and it is a struggle. They live frugally. There is no way I would even consider it under $100K if you have the standard 2 kids.
Post # 8
You can’t have a comfortable life for 2 adults+1 or 2 kids for anything uner 100k. Even with 100k I think you still struggle but then again what’s standard for me maybe it’s luxury for someone else..
Post # 9
Darling Husband and I both make sizeable salaries. In our area, I don’t think I’ve ever even met a Stay-At-Home Mom or Stay-At-Home Wife. It’s just too expensive.
Post # 10
Mrs.Sawyertobe: You realize that only 20% of households in the US make 100k. That means that the vast majority of families with both parents working make less than that (infact half of them make less than 50k.
Out of curiosity, where do you live? In my area it would not be dificult at all to live on 50k, average household income here (Central VA) is $37,000. I am not out in the sticks or anything like that either, it is a small city, with significant large corporations here.
abeautybride: Are you saying that 4 out of 5 american families don’t live comfortably? It is a fact that 80% of US households make less than 100k total.
Post # 11
MakingHerWait: Lexington KY. It would be doable under $100K before they were in school, maybe, because school district is not an issue. If you want to live in a good school district and have your kids in activities and save for college and save for retirement, and take an occasional vacation, I just don’t see it happening on much less than $100K. In my area of town, that is the low end of the salaries. My kids always wonder why they have so much less than others.
Post # 12
JiminyCricket: We have TONS of SAHMs in my daughter’s school (not me), but we also have tons of doctors’ wives…….
Post # 13
Mrs.Sawyertobe: But you live in Kentucky. I live in a major metropolitan area on the East Coast. In my area, one income houses are almost an urban legend.
Post # 14
JiminyCricket: I guess that’s true. I live in the most expensive part of Kentucky, but a surgeon making $300-$500K a year can live pretty comfortably. Here, I would define comfortable at about $175 and up and well off at around $300K. I guess in New York (or insert other major city like San Francisco), $300K wouldn’t make you all that comfortable….
Post # 15
Mrs.Sawyertobe: “My kids always wonder why they have so much less than others.”
That’s just sad.