(Closed) SAHW?

posted 7 years ago in Married Life
  • poll: Would you ever be a SAHW/FI/SO? (not SAHM)
    Are you kidding me? In a heartbeat if I could. : (113 votes)
    37 %
    No way. I would never feel comfortable knowing I could be working but I'm not. : (150 votes)
    49 %
    I am, but not by choice. : (19 votes)
    6 %
    I am, and I love it! : (26 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 62
    Member
    1652 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    In a second! I love being at home and looking after the house, I feel I belong there honestly!

    Post # 63
    Member
    2104 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I would. I would spend my time cooking lavish meals, painting, horseback riding, and volunteering for a local dog rescue. 

    Post # 64
    Member
    1430 posts
    Bumble bee

    I would go crazy bored if I was a stay at home wife. I love my job and get a lot of satisfaction. Also makes me enjoy my time off more. If I had nothing to do everyday I would resent it after awhile. I’d go for part time though.Even as a Stay-At-Home Mom I would still want to do part time I think. I couldn’t part with my career so easily it is a big part of who I am.

    Post # 65
    Member
    1474 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

    I could never be a Stay-At-Home Wife – I would absolutely go crazy. I appreciate that others enjoy and are good at keeping a house, but I am not one of those people. I love my job and feel so much more productive, intellectually stimulated, and personally fulfilled by what I do there than cooking, cleaning, etc. Also, Darling Husband is a way better cook than me, so he kind of has a monopoly on all things kitchen-related in our house. 🙂

    Post # 66
    Member
    4047 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I agree with many PPs that I would be boreed stiff if I were a Stay-At-Home Wife. The only time I would do it would be if we were ridiculously wealthy and my income would hardly make a dent. Then maybe I would be a Stay-At-Home Wife and do a ton of volunteer work. I’d probably hire a maid if I were that rich, but I love to cook, so I would still do all of that.

    But in reality we will be middle class, and I would rather spend my time contributing to our income and financial future even if I could stay home. I like to be busy. 

    Post # 67
    Member
    369 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I would love to be able to just have a part time job. I would never be able to be a full time stay at home wife because I would get so bored.

    Post # 68
    Member
    1069 posts
    Bumble bee

    I honestly don’t think I could ever do it. I think I would be bored because I actually do like working and having some kind of purpose other than taking care of my husband. I wouldn’t mind working 3 days a week though! Also, I would hate not having my own money. I’ve been financially independent since I was 18 so I think it would be too huge of an adjustment for me.

    My bf’s ex wife quit her job as soon as she got married and he said he still doesn’t know what she did all day.. the house was clean (I think he underestimates how long it takes to clean a house!) but she didn’t do any grocery shopping, didn’t cook, and didn’t have any friends that she saw throughout the day.

    Post # 69
    Member
    1078 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    No way.  I would go crazy.  I also couldn’t stand not having my own money.

    Post # 70
    Member
    979 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I voted yes, but I would probably get a part time job to keep myself from being bored. I would quit my job in a heartbeat. There’s only so many hours in your life, I’d rather spend them with family, my dogs, riding horses, and making life a bit easier on Fiance. Of course he’s still in school so this won’t be happening for quite a while.

    Post # 71
    Member
    126 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I don’t understand why so many people think work is the thing that automatically gives their life “fulfillment” or gives their time “meaning.” 

    I stay at home and have more things to do with my time than I ever did in any office job, and certainly more than my husband does at his job. My husband makes more than enough money for us to have a comfortable life and a healthy retirement fund. The money I could make isn’t enough to justify the long hours and commute I’d take, or at least that is what my husband thinks. If/when he changes his mind, I’ll get a job.

    I volunteer, take classes, cook every day, clean, help friends with their kids, read, hike, and handle all of the boring tasks and chores of the household so my husband doesn’t have to deal with any of it. I feel fulfilled.

    Post # 72
    Member
    2902 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    No way, I am capable of contributing so much more than just cooking and cleaning for my husband/wife. I would go nuts if that was my life. I also love having my own money.

    Stay-At-Home Mom or working a farm is definitely not in the same boat as Stay-At-Home Wife – that is definitely work!

    Post # 73
    Member
    3941 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I know a Stay-At-Home Wife, and I certainly do not envy her.  I actually feel bad for her.  I know her Husband doesn’t want her to work, but I would feel really…useless?  We all have talents and abilities…why not take advantage of all of that while you can.  We’re almost proving society right by staying home when we’re perfectly capable of being out and about working our asses off just like the men. 

    Disclaimer: I understand if you’re looking for a job and can’t find one – this was me for a couple of months.  That’s a totally different story.

    Post # 74
    Member
    5656 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    Hey don’t get me wrong, I’d love to stay home all day and not work, and instead fill my life with crafts and hobbies that may or may not actually have any monetary value. I could focus on painting and reading and singing. Volunteer locally, take hiking trips with my dog and all sorts of other things like that with just a bit of errands and housework inbetween. Sure of course I’d do that.

    In reality though, I don’t expect to live that kind of life until I retire. Until then I will pull my weight just like my husband so that we can have the comfy retirement we’re planning. I’m not going to be a freeloader when I am just as capable of doing something to get us there sooner.

    When I have kids, I will be a stay at home mom at least while they are young, but we would still see that as contributing to our futures.

    Post # 75
    Member
    4272 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @KateByDesign:  Well, thankfully we have the ability to have that choice which we should all be thankful. Many women are still not allowed to work or get an education. Knowing that you can have that freedom to make your own money and make something of yourself is something people really take for granted. So, I do not look down on those women that choose not to work. For me it is fine, as long as they are not forbidden from working. I get what you mean though, I would feel useless as well.

    Post # 76
    Member
    3624 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Haha I’m torn between HELLLLL NO and OF COURSE! I mean, if Darling Husband and I were billionaires, I imagine that neither of us would work. So yes, of course I wish we were billionaires. Otherwise, I really don’t see why I would stay at home if I could be working and making money…

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