(Closed) Same BM dress as cousin-in-law dilemma

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: What should I do about the identical BM dress?
    Keep them and hope no one will notice they're alike! : (51 votes)
    81 %
    Keep them, but alter the length to have a slight difference. : (6 votes)
    10 %
    Buy new ones - you don't want to be known as a copy catter! : (3 votes)
    5 %
    Other - I'll explain below. : (3 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    14183 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Not a big deal. That dress is pretty basic. I wouldn’t worry. Let the cousin know you guys have the same dress but you didn’t want her to think you were copying her.

    Plus i’m sure they’re differentc colors.

    Post # 4
    304 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I agree with ejs4y8.  The dress is a classic style, and I doubt most people will notice they are the same.  In fact, if you think about it, most people see bridesmaid dresses and think “strapless, long dress” or “short v neck dress,” and lots of styles fall into this category.


    Post # 5
    1580 posts
    Bumble bee

    You could add a sash or something to yours. But I don’t think you need to order different dresses. Are they different colors at least?

    Post # 6
    2889 posts
    Sugar bee

    As long as they are different colors I think you’ll be fine. Maybe talk to FI’s cousin and let her know you just found out and your girls already ordered so you hope she is okay with it, mention how she has good taste and hope she’s not too upset. If she is really upset and still fuming after 2 weeks, I would consider changing. If they are the same color I would change the color if possible or add a sash or strap or cap sleeve or something.

    Post # 7
    5670 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I agree with the other bees. As long as they are a different color you should be fine. I would talk to your cousin-in-law and just let her know the situation. Just make it clear that you didn’t know about her dresses and you found out after she ordered them. Also you can find out what type of jewlery and shoes that her girls are wearing and just make sure you do something a little different.

    Post # 8
    2775 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    Don’t worry about it.  Even if they are the same color, nobody will notice.

    Post # 9
    647 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I voted keep them, and I don’t think you even have to hope that no one will notice they’re the same, because I really think no one will notice.  Identical dresses look different on different bodies, and it’s not like anyone will be carrying around photos of the bridesmaids from the previous wedding and holding them up to compare.  Also remember, no one notices these details as much as the bride.  Even if they’re the same color, I doubt anyone will remember the other dresses.

    Post # 10
    14 posts
    • Wedding: October 2010

    OMG, those are the dresses we are using in our wedding, lol. What are your colors vs. hers?

    Post # 12
    141 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Definitely different enough in color that no one will notice, especially 2 months apart.

    Post # 13
    99 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    Definitely keep! Especially since your wedding is after hers.

    Post # 14
    9053 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Nobody will notice.  At her wedding they’ll say the bridesmaids wore strapless long red dresses, and at yours they’ll say they wore strapless long, green dresses.

    The options out there are limited.  It’s no big deal!

    Post # 15
    5822 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I think you should talk to your CIL about this…if she doesn’t mind, then don’t worry about it.  If she DOES mind, I would change them right away to keep the peace.

    Post # 16
    78 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I vote keep them, and if you can, think about incorperating a cute contrasting sash with flower or belt or something equally adorable, just to change it up a bit.

    And I would let your cousin know that you accidentally picked the same dress. Nothing worse than being surprised about these things. Lol.

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