(Closed) Same shoes and accessories for all?

posted 11 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 17
110 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2020

I’d let them choose what accessories and shoes. If you have something in mind you could specify a color or style you prefer, but not the exact pair of shoes.

Post # 18
4479 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

Let them pick and tell them you want final approval. I think it’s fair… I’m sure they’d be happier to spend money on something that they chose (and so they might wear it again) and to express their own style at least a little, and if you get approval rights then you don’t need to worry that it will be too crazy.

And please please please let them pick their own shoes! I have never complained about anything being a bridesmaid to the bride other than being forced to wear shoes that HURT!

Post # 20
5150 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would either 

a) give them CHOICES you have pre-selected to pick from


b) have them run it by you and make sure you o-k it all 🙂 

Post # 21
519 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I have picked the dresses, but I know that unless they wear outrageously tall shoes, no one will even know what they are wearing under there. As for jewelry, I thought about getting them a simple necklace as a bridal party gift, but I am starting to think some of them may not like the necklace and will feel obligated to wear it…so I am putting the kabash on that idea. I’m probably going to let them wear their own jewelry, I should be able to trust these girls’ judgement. 🙂 they have their own personalities, but they will be tasteful and that’s why I love them.

Post # 22
76 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I think everyone’s suggestions above about various ways to let them pick their accessories, but within certain parameters so there aren’t any surprises, is the way to go.  I think the matchy-matchy bridesmaid look is getting really outdated.

Post # 23
1732 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’m letting everyone choose their own shoes (I’ve asked for silver heels) and I am finding/making necklaces for them.  I want the jewelry to all go together but not be matchy matchy.  Since the dresses are all the same, I think it would look nice!

Post # 24
676 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I chose the dress with their input – I gave them six options and we chose the one everyone liked best. I’m letting them wear whatever shoes and jewelry they’d like as long as both the shoes and jewelry are gold so that it fits with my theme. I’m loaning out a couple pairs of my shoes and I bought them all a set of sparkly gold bangles from a little store in Little India.

Post # 25
177 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

i have 6 BM’s who are a different sizes and have totally different styes.  i let them all pick out their own dresses in the same colors.  i did however fall in love with these chartresue pumps and couldn’t resist to buy them for all the BM’s!  so they are all wearing matching pumps.  as for jewelry…i could care less.  they can wear whatever they want.  they are happy, and i am happy!

Post # 26
1205 posts
Bumble bee

I’m with DC Anna – My girls are picking their own dresses and everything to go with them.  I am arming them with a swatch to try to match, a guideline and some rules.  (Hem between knee and calf, etc)  I think they will all feel more comfortable in things they like and that reflect them – plus, its less headache for me.

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