(Closed) Same venue as a good friend

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll:
    Nope don't do it, kinda tacky.... : (11 votes)
    12 %
    If you love it, who cares!! : (76 votes)
    81 %
    Other, explain below : (7 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 3
    11325 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    To be safe I’d probably talk about your friend (and assure her that you’ll be going a different way with decorations)… but I really don’t see why it would matter. If anything I’d be really flattered that someone liked my wedding enough to want to use my venue! I think it’d be a different situation if you booked the same venue a friend already booked for a date before your friend’s wedding… but I think this would totally fine. 🙂

    Post # 4
    5657 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    The venue isn’t now claimed by her simply because she had her wedding there first. Since the wedding has already come and gone, I don’t see a problem with it. Also, as long as you don’t copy her wedding colors, it will still look and feel like a different wedding.

    Post # 5
    1032 posts
    Bumble bee

    I think it would be fine, but I would talk to your friends to ask what they thought of it. They will most likely be flattered I would think, that is one heck of a wedding compliment! Like CorgiTales said, I would also make sure you decorate differently though, but I say talk to them and then go for it!

    Post # 6
    1079 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    As a wedding guest it wouldn’t be quite as special if I’d been there before. And if your guests don’t think it’s new and special it probably won’t be quite as cool for you. But I don’t think your friend should mind.

    Post # 7
    720 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I don’t know if this was the result of bad juju or not…

    We booked a venue after going to a wedding of a close friend.  It was what we thought we could afford at the time and we were really excited to find such a beautiful place.  Unfortunately a year later they went bankrupt and took our money.  So in the end, we will not have the same venue as our friends, but we were supposed to.  There was an overlap of about 10 guests who would have been at both weddings.

    Post # 8
    505 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2012

    Theres a venue near me that a TON of my friends got married at.  Like yours, its centrally located for friends/family near and far.  It is a gorgeous place and not one friend had it decorated the same since they all have different tastes.  The only thing that was common is the twinkle lights, but that is part of the venue..you can not get rid of them. 

    And not one friend asked the previous bride how she might feel with the new bride using the venue.  There are no “stakes” in a wedding venue.

    If you like, use it.  If anyone has an issue with it, then they are petty and need to get over themselves.  Besides your wedding will be almost a year after, no biggie.

    Post # 10
    77 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I’d ask your friend if she would have any issues with it, if she’s fine with it then go for it.

    Post # 11
    9029 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    just because she got married there doesnt mean u have to talk to her first about it. she doesnt own the place and cant lay claim to it. its a public venue thats up for hire! i personally have alot of friends and i have been to several weddings at the same chapel and reception hall and i never thought of it as being claimed by the first person who used it, because each person adds their own, theme/color and personal taste to it. go ahead and use the venue you love. 

    Post # 13
    1927 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I don’t think your friend will mind at all.  Her wedding is over and done with and as the others said she will likely take it as a compliment.  BUT.. I wouldn’t like it if I were YOU. I wanted my wedding to be special, and i would be upset if I felt like all my friends were comparing it to the other wedding. 

    Post # 14
    212 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    We literally have two venue choices in our little town. Unless you get married at a church or someone’s house (like we are), these two are it. I have been to and seen pictures of several events at these places. Even though the places look the same, you can totally tell there is a different “feel” to each wedding there. I’ve never heard anyone complain or put anyone else down for getting married at the same place they did.

    So, in short, I think you will be fine, and the two events can be very unique.

    Post # 15
    6661 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I thought you were going to say that you both just got engaged and picked the same venue and your weddings are a few weeks apart. You are totally fine, she doesn’t own the venue and personally I would be really flattered if someone used mine because of my wedding. If it’s beautiful and convenient like you said, I really don’t think anyone will complain!

    Just maybe give her a call before making your deposit as a courtesy to say that because of her amazing wedding you have decided to book the same venue and you’re so excited about it.

    Post # 16
    647 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    @babybluz:I think as you and your friends get older and married, and will have attended more and more weddings, it’s bound to happen that weddings are at the same place!  I mean, depending on where you’re at, there aren’t limitless options for venues.  I don’t think anyone will compare the way it looks – they probably don’t even remember.

    As for asking her – totally not necessary.  I would think it was weird if someone asked if they were allowed to get married at my venue.

    The topic ‘Same venue as a good friend’ is closed to new replies.

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