(Closed) sand ceremonies–do you like these? (pic heavy)

posted 5 years ago in Traditions
Post # 16
Member
1789 posts
Buzzing bee

I think its cute normally, but the ones you have pictures are ugly. The decorations on the bottles make them look cheap and tacky like a PP said

Post # 17
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m not a fan of the sand/candle unity stuff. I just don’t see the point…you’re already saying vows and exchanging rings, do you really need to be unified even more with sand or candles? And what do you do with it after? I’d think it would just be something to sit on a shelf and collect dust afterwards.

Post # 18
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2014

We found an awesome frame! It has one of our engagement photoss in it fornow until we get our wedding picks back! We used 3 different colors, White on the bottom then layered pink and green! Looks beautiful!

Post # 19
Member
474 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We did it and it was one of my favorite parts of the ceremony.  We are a blended family.  He has a son and I have 2 sons from previous marriages.  Each of us had a different color, including the Minister.  We, along with the Minister wrote the ceremony about all of us now being joined together etc.  Every one loved it.  I used a simple mason jar so you can see all the colors and each color was in a small oil/vinegar decanter that I got super cheap at AC Moore. 

Post # 20
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2014

This is ours & we used mas jars to hold the sand prior to pouring!

Post # 21
Member
2216 posts
Buzzing bee

mtom:  I see it as a children’s activity and don’t like the end result, so I don’t see the point. I also don’t see the sand ceremony as rooted in any real tradition, so I think of it as a pseudotradition that’s being marketed as a tradition to people who don’t have any other cultural traditions to fall back on. Sorry, I know that sounds harsh, but that’s just my opinion.

My exception is if a couple has (presumably young) children who participate in the sand ceremony. Then I think it’s sweet that they’re involving their children in the ceremony.

Olgarie:  boomer715:  I’ve read that the candle ceremony has roots in the pagan/celtic handfasting ritual, which, at least to me, makes it less tacky and something that is based in a cultural tradition that a couple may want to adopt.

Similarly, I have seen a couple share a unity drink, which seems like a nod to the Orthodox Christian tradition of drinking from the common cup as representing sharing the cup of life together.

Post # 22
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2014

mtom:  I’m getting married on the beach this Saturday and a “sand ceremony” is included in the beach wedding package. I did get to choose what color sand I wanted! haha, cheesy or not it will be cute, and give me something to take home as a souvenir. 🙂

 

Post # 23
Member
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Historic house and gardens

My Fiance said ‘I don’t want any of that hippy crap’ and I have to agree with him. Our celebrant started suggesting sand or candle ceremonies when we met with her and the faces we both pulled was enough for her to stop talking and cross it off the list. Definitely not a fan. It’s just messy and a waste of time and you get stuck with useless nick nacks.

Post # 24
Member
1540 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

capriciouskat:  we’re doing a beach wedding too! I think it fits the sand ceremony when it’s on the beach. We’re just using the sand from the beach though….not anything fancy

Post # 25
Member
894 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

We are doing it, but ours is much different than those pictured.  They are small, jugs? I guess would be the right term.  With corks for lids.  The “jug” is engraved with our names and the date of our wedding.  There are 3 colors of sand.  One is the base color, which each of our parents will dump a little bit in. 

 

Kind of like this, https://img1.etsystatic.com/000/0/6211496/il_fullxfull.255050517.jpg 

Post # 26
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I’m against them as well. I think the trend is a little tired and definitely tacky. I don’t think your desire to have some sort of “unity” element in your ceremony is misguided though. At my sister’s wedding they did a painting. They had a canvas on an easel and two paint colors in squirt bottles (the clear ketchup kind) and they went at it. I held my breath the whole time about paint on the dress, rented tuxes, building, etc. but they had a cloth underneath and everyone came out clean. Now they have this artwork that they made together and can always keep displayed. Also, can you imagine trying to move homes with some sort of sand artwork? Even if it’s sealed, it could be tipped over and jostled and the layered pattern would be destroyed.

Post # 27
Member
774 posts
Busy bee

mtom:  We did a sand ceremony but like someone else said, we also included a third sand color which the officiant poured in first and last to represent God being the foundation and covering of our marriage. It was sweet and I like our sand jar sitting on our counter. Brings back happy wedding day memories when I look at it and does serve as a good reminder of who gave us this relationship and who we are accountable to for it (God). 

BUT like pp said, you don’t want any decorative items on the jars you use because it blocks the view of the sand. Just get pretty jars. Also, you only keep the center jar because the ones you poured from will be empty so those don’t matter at all. If the jar does not have a lid or cork, you can also melt wax over the top of the sand later to create a seal. We haven’t tried it yet but that is on the to-do list. 

Last advice – don’t use nearly as much sand as is shown in the pictures you posted. That will take forever to pour and people (including yourselves) will probably get tired of it. You just want a couple inches…enough for the symbolism to come across.

Post # 28
Member
774 posts
Busy bee

And I just realized how old this post was…so my advice is pretty much irrelevant. Whoops! Sorry all!

Post # 29
Member
2257 posts
Buzzing bee

mtom:  I also think they’re pretty useless. Unless you have a vessel you can close and the exact amount of sand to fill it COMPLETELY, you have to be super careful with it, otherwise your sand mixes, creating a muddled mess, or worse it knocks over.

I spent the night at my cousin’s house once and she had her sand vessel on the night stand of the guest room. I sometimes roll out of bed, especially in an unfamiliar place, and I was so paranoid I’d knock it over.

But yeah, they’re pretty cheesy IMO.

Post # 30
Member
325 posts
Helper bee

We’re doing one in a very small, simple glass vase that we can keep on our mantle. We’re having a beach wedding, so it makes sense. My mom has been bugging me about doing one like this, which I love the look of on the beach, but I’m not sure I’d want to carry it home, etc etc…

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