(Closed) Save the date but no invite?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 16
Member
2430 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

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DenHWedding:  It’s possible that the invite was lost or not sent yet.  But it’s also possible that they had a change in plans and had to cut down their guest list which would be embarassing to say the least. When we got married I messed up my cousin’s invitation and it came back to us which was awkward at first because her parents and 2 other siblings and families got them, but hot her.  She called me and I apologized profusely, and mailed a new invitation immediately!

I’d call her, but be sure to preface it in such a way that she knows you wont be upset if something did happen and they can’t invite you now.  I’d say something like “Hey Jenny, I was just calling because I noticed from your save the date card that the wedding is coming up soon, and I still haven’t gotten an invite.  I know things can get hectic or even lost in the mail, so I just wanted to see if if you were still able to have me attend?” 

That way, if it was a mix up she can fix it easily, and if it’s a change in plans, she can explain it without the pressung of you being mad at her.  

Post # 17
Member
3080 posts
Sugar bee

For one couple we know, we got the save the date postcards 4 months before the wedding and the invitation 4 weeks before. I put the wrong date on the calendar (I marked Saturday night and the wedding was Friday), from the StD (I throw them out, unless they’re magnets), and when the invitation finally arrived, already had other plans for that night. Ugh!

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