(Closed) save the date etiquette :)

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
410 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

If you are living together I would put your own address. I used our address for all our wedding stuff. I ordered cute return address labels.

FYI, if you’re changing your name,  order labels with your new last name for the Thank You’s. I didn’t think to do that and wound up using the old ones. Not a big deal, but I wish I had thought of that.

Post # 4
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I put my parent’s address, but only because Fiance and I were moving during our wedding planning process. For our actual invites, the returns are to us.

I second remembering to buy labels or stamps with new name. I got a free stamp that says FI & Amelia Bedelia and I’m excited!! 🙂 I also got new labels, but just with my name, so we’ll probably use the stamp.

Post # 5
1699 posts
Bumble bee

Proper traditional etiquette, as you know, says don’t use Save-The-Date notices at all: send  a hand-written note to the people who truly need advanced warning of the wedding. You’d put your own return address on such a note, of course.

The reason you put your own address on such a note is, that if the letter should prove to be undeliverable for any reason, that is the address to which you wish the envelope to be returned. The envelope is not part of the social correspondence inside it: it is a business document between you as customer, and the post office as service-provider. Regardless of the etiquette rules that apply to the envelope’s contents, you follow post-office guidelines regarding what you write on the envelope itself.

Where do you want undeliverable envelopes returned? That’s what you put on the return address.

Post # 7
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Can I tag a question along to your thread?  Are you sending separate Save-The-Date Cards to individual people or 1 to a family? 

For example: I’m sending separate wedding invitations to my aunt/uncle, cousin #1 + guest, cousin #2 + guest, and cousin #3 + guest (4 wedding invitations total).  But do I really need to send that family 4 separate STDs?  I mean, I’m sure it’s probably proper etiquette to do that, but I’m wondering if it’s just going to be a waste…

Post # 8
768 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

We live together, so I used ours. Depending on who it was going to (my fam/his) depended on whose name I put first. 🙂


@ItaliaBride – in that case, I only sent one but wrote all names on envelope. My thought was why would they want 4 save the date magnets plastered all over their fridge….but that’s me


Post # 9
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

My thoughts exactly!  I was going to do that too – I felt like it wouldn’t be necessary to send several save the dates to one household.  The whole house can save the date together.  haha

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