(Closed) Save the date : help

posted 6 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
1916 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Why bother sending the save the dates if you’re sending out the invitation three months later?  If you send out your invites that early, you’re likely to not get a very accurate head count.  Are you having a destination wedding?  I sent my save the dates nine months in advance and my invites three months before.

I would include the information about no kids on your wedding website.

Post # 4
1217 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

It’s customary to send invitations about 3 months before the wedding. That gives your guests enough time to make arrangements (e.g. reserving a hotel room, hiring a baby-sitter, or taking time off work if your wedding is on a weekday) while still being close enough to the wedding that people don’t forget all about it or have no idea what will be going on on their calendar the day of your wedding. I really don’t think it’s too wise to mail out invites much more than 3 months in advance. For example, suppose you change your mind about the food or even, and hopefully not!, the venue.. It would be very time-consuming and could be expensive and confusing to send out new invites after making a major change. (The reason I bring up food is that if you are giving your guests a choice of entrees, you will probably need to include a space in your RSVP card for them to check off which option they want.)

A lot of people of the older generation will read the names on the invitation envelope to find out who is invited – for example, if you write “Ms. Jane and guest,” they’d know they could bring a date, or “Mr. and Mrs. Smith,” that means the parents and no kids. You could reinforce this with some information on your website, or try to let people know by word-of-mouth that you prefer no kids at your wedding.

I wouldn’t include anything about no kids on the save-the-date – again, I would try to go by word-of-mouth and be very specific about how you write out peoples’ names on the envelopes. And as far as when to send out a save-the-date, if you want to send it out early to help out-of-town guests have plenty of time to plan airfare and hotel accomodations, that’s fine… I think the most common time to send out Save-The-Date Cards is ~6 months before the wedding, but I don’t think it would hurt if you wanted to send them out earlier.

Anyways, hope that helps! 🙂

Post # 6
1217 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Sure no problem, I’m happy to help – I needed the same advice when I first started wedding planning 🙂

I would hold onto the save-the-dates for maybe 3 more months and then send them out, because what’s a little scary about planning a wedding that will happen NEXT year is a lot of people don’t have calendars yet for next year. I’d hope that most people use electronic calendars these days, but still, 9 months seems like a good amount of time for people to be able to plan ahead.

If you’re getting anxious already about the wedding, most of us have been there! If you’re planning on doing DIY projects for the wedding now is the best time to do them! When we get married in November we’ll have had a 11-month engagement. I started doing projects right away so I can somewhat relax the last couple months (and because I couldn’t wait to get started!). 

Post # 8
325 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Piney River Ranch

My wedding is next June and I just mailed out our save the dates today.  Most of our guests will be traveling from out-of-state so I wanted them to know the date and have our wedding website address ASAP.  I know most people say not to send them out until 9 months before, but I don’t see the harm at all in sending them a tad early.  Giving people too much time is better than not enough time.

As far as invites, I still think the general rule of 3 months before the wedding should apply.  They already have the save the date and know the date/place, so there’s no need for them to receive a formal invitation that early.

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