Post # 1
I just bought my save the date invitations. I am now realizing the people on my B list will know that they are either not invited or on the b list…. which makes me feel bad. I have to send out the save the date cards because its a destination wedding. I would like to invite them all but its impossible.. I have a very BIG family. I have alot of relatives who I would love to invite but my immediate family comes first. I would be inviting my Great Aunts and Great Uncles but their dughters and sons which are my 2nd or 3rd cousins are on the B list Is it wrong to put my realitives on the B list? I was told that since they are your 2 or 3rd cousins its ok… ? Is that true?
Post # 3
This is tough one, you want to include all your relatives, but clearly you’ve decided you can not. Unfortunatly, these extended family members are going to find out anyway… I would not tell ANYONE they are on a “B” list or similar. If it comes up, you can explain that you have a space limitation, or say something like “we are hoping for an intimate event with a smaller guest list etc.” If your STD’s are going out well in advance, the word will spread, I would not say “no second cousins” or anything like that because it’s likely that you will have friends in attendance, or family members/friends from your FI’s side… Some family members may feel like their attendance should take priority over a non-family member. I would encourage you to make a plan, discuss it with your parents and his (if applicable so they’re on the same page and will not waffle or say ‘of course cousin so and so should have received an invite…’) and when Great Aunt Mary calls to whine, you’ll be prepared, and confident to stand by your decision. This is your day… not theirs.
Post # 4
Thank you for the advice! I agree, by telling people its going to be a small intimate event….. hopefully they will understand. You can never make everyone happy and it is my day 🙂