Save The Dates/Wedding Invites

posted 4 months ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 2
2539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

we have discussed sending Save The Dates 10-11 months in advance and the invitations 8 months in advance.

Is this appropriate? STD’s – yes, Invites – no. I would never send invites 8 months in advance, it’s unnecessary. The earliest i’ve ever seen invites sent is 12 weeks prior. 

Kids – we addressed invites to the family and listed the kids. Then we had a space for total attending and names. 


Post # 3
3193 posts
Sugar bee

Yes, send the save the dates as soon as you have the location nailed down. Put your wedding website on it even if it is not built out yet.

No, don’t send the invites eight months in advance. Twelve weeks is fine.

List the kids’ names on the outer envelope. No need to give the kids a choice, just arrange for a kids meal for them. But I think 13 may be too high a cut off unless you know the tweens are picky eaters that prefer tenders and fries. 

Post # 4
1950 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2019

Save the Dates: Yes, send out 10mos in advance

Invites: No need to send out super early if the save the dates go out. Just send 6-8wks before the wedding 

Kids on Invites: Add name on outer envelope or addres to: Mr. and Mrs. John Doe, Jane, Jim and Johnny if you are not using two envelopes 

Kids Meals: Arrange for a number of kids meals. For those close to the cutoff age, make sure to call the people and ask if their child would prefer a kids or an adult meal. And let those with small kids know that there will be a kids meal option. You can also just have RSVPs that state “Children’s Meal” 

We had a lot of family kids at our wedding and one thing that my mom did was get clear plastic cups with lids and straws for the kids. She filled them with crayons, coloring pages, activity pages, dolls, cars, etc. (there were ones for girls and boys) to keep them entertained throughout the reception. She got them all at the $1 store, so they were pretty cheap. Also, since all the drinks at the venue were served in glass, the plastic cups came in handy for the parents! They could just pour the kids drink into the plastic cup and didn’t have to worry about them dropping one. Just an idea! Here they were:

Post # 5
1840 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

I’d allow the parents to pick children’s meal or not on the rsvp instead of automatically giving it to kids. My girls at 9 and 11 are already gravitating towards adult entrees. I think once they are both 12 it’d be hard to convince them to take nuggets over a regular meal. And boys eat a lot more than girls, so they might want more food at an earlier age than 14. 

I’m giving the parents the option and then if they don’t specify, I’m setting a cutoff of 12 for kids meals. 

Post # 6
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2019 - York, ME

We told everyone the date and location 10 months in advance as the “Save the Date” and then mailed our invitations in January for a May wedding.  We wanted everyone to be able to buy flights and reserve lodging since it’s a vacation destination and over a holiday weekend.  I think 8 months out is a little long though, I would wait until 4-5 months out if I were you.

I would treat kids that are 13+ as adults.  My venue had a choice for kids meals, so anyone under 13 should be able to find something that they like and that is filling enough.  We are having prime rib and lobster as our entree options, I can’t imagine a 9 or 11 year old needing an entree like that like PP mentioned!  I agree though that having a 14 year old order a kids meal is too much.

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