(Closed) Save the Dates…whose name goes first?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
2237 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I’ve wondered the same thing myself actually, but my name is coming first just because we’re A&B (and I’m playing that up), I just wondered if that was technically wrong of me.

Post # 4
Member
5388 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

The bride’s name goes first, just like on the invitations.

Post # 5
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Etiquette usually dictates that the female’s name comes first.  But I think these days you can get away with whatever you think sounds best (and this is coming from someone who likes to adhere to proper etiquette at all times).  We went with “FI & Vanessa” because it just flows better when you read it or say it aloud.  However, on the formal invite my name will come first of course.  STDs tend to be a little less formal so I say go with your preference.

Post # 6
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

It’s always the women’s first prior to getting married

Post # 7
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Nobody will notice, do what you want. These are rules that we all have to look up when we get married, which means that the only people that would even have a chance of noticing are recent brides, and even then, it is such a non-issue that they won’t care. I say that these “rules” are only valid if the majority of society is aware of and adheres to them. And they don’t. So I threw the book out the window and went with what looked/sounded best!

Post # 9
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Actually I just checked my Save-The-Date Cards and I did put my name first.  I must have changed that as I am sure I had it the other way around before they were printed!  However, I stick by what I said if it “sounds better” to put your FI’s name first.  But formal invitations should have your name first.  I did put “FIandVanessa…” for our website though.  Seriously telling the truth this time as I just checked 🙂  And that was because it sounds better and I didn’t like the way “vanessaand” looked if my name went first.

Post # 10
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

A good way to remember whose name goes first is that before the wedding, if you want to be etiquetley correct, the bride’s name goes first and after the wedding the groom’s name goes first.

Post # 11
Hostess
16215 posts
Honey Beekeeper

The bride goes first. 🙂

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