MrsKing212: Do you think we would need to save for the entire wedding beforehand? A friend of mine told me that prior to the wedding you only put about 10% on everything, and after the fact you pay in full. Is that something you think you can count on getting from guests, or would you have all the money beforehand? (we’re not really saving for a house or anything else, just saving in general)
swonderful: That is very impressive! I’m in grad school so am going to be in a lot of debt. There’s nothing I can really do about it because I won’t be able to pay it off until I’m done and have a stable income. That’s part of the reason I’m asking about savings, because I personally won’t have any until I get a “real” job. Despite that, I would like to get married before said stable job because otherwise we’re always going to put it off instead of dealing with finances as a married couple.
Mango817: Question – did you talk to your parents about the financial aspect of the wedding before or after you got engaged? This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. If SO and I save for the entire wedding ourselves we likely won’t have the money for 10+ years. That being said, we’re fairly certain our families will help us out and will be happy to see us get married sooner rather than later. I’m just not sure when it would be appropriate to talk to them about it (since the engagement is not official yet).
damarajade: cpick: Are you worried about getting all the money back after the wedding? My friend said her guests covered the entire cost of the wedding and then some. I’m curious though if that’s the exception or the rule. I think I could handle paying deposits along the way if I know I’ll get the money back after the reception. If not though, then what?
pinkshoes: That’s part of the problem on my end. I would love to have a large cushion, but seeing as I’m in school I don’t have any income. So SO’s income supports himself and me to an extent, and luckily, I get a lot of help from my parents as well. We don’t need to save for a house, but I just want to ensure the wedding won’t bankrupt us. We’ve already been together for 5 years, so if I think about not getting married until I do have my own savings, I get really depressed as that won’t happen for a very long time. And it’s not that I need a wedding so badly, it’s that I want to handle the next 5+ years of my life with my SO as my husband, so we could truly be a team. However, with our families, getting a cheap or courthouse or elopement wedding are out of the question. It’s kind of all or nothing at this point.
sway0060: I like how straightforward you are lol So, we are not saving for a house, but we both have a lot of debt. However, there’s no way it’s all getting paid off before we get married. SO is slowly working at reducing his debt, and I won’t be able to start paying mine off for a few years. Sure waiting until it’s paid off is an option, but that might not happen until we’re 65. We would also like to be engaged for about a year. Do you still think we could save along the way?
sienna76: You guys are super lucky and great planners! You’re right though that at mid 30 your financial situation is different than that of someone in mid 20. I’m hoping to be a lot more financially stable by then (I’m 25 now), but can’t imagine waiting that long to get married.
lovekiss: Wow! That’s a lot to save for before getting married. How did you handle the “waiting” in that respect? I can’t imagine saving for that long, though granted, I don’t currently have an income, which does tend to make saving easier lol)