- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
This is such a bad idea on so many levels.
Host what you can afford. You don’t ask your guests to pay for you to host a fancy party that is more expensive then what you can afford.
This “advice” seems to loose sight of the fact that all that is required to get married is a marriage licence and officiant (under 200 bucks in most places).
No one is entitled to a big, white, wedding. It is nice, but a trip to city hall makes you just as married as someone who hosts 1500 people, with a 14 course meal, and dancing tigers.
That sounds extremely rude & a recipe for disaster!
WOW… I am not a total stickler for ettiquite, but in no way is this appropriate! I would be offended at this if I saw it. I think that if something is not in your budget don’t do it for your wedding! Don’t ask others to pay for it!!! I would rather have something hand made by someone than a gift card to a photographer!!!
If you can’t afford your wedding, don’t have it. This is putting the cart WAY before the horse, and if a friend of mine did this, I wouldn’t go. I don’t care if it was my best friend, and the wedding was next door. If people have this little couth and taste, I don’t want them in my life.
I’m horrified by this article.
@Treejewel19: Totally agreed. Convention holds that if a bride’s parents pay for the wedding, they get imput on the guest list. By that logic, if I paid, it seems like there’s an amount I could pay for theme-decision rights. Sort of like naming rights for a stadium. Then I’d make the theme “Butts.”
That sounds tacky
Aside from appropriateness, this just seems tricky. What if a couple is banking on receiving a certain amount in wedding donations but falls short?
As others have said, the old saying “He who pays gets to say” makes it all very scarey. Many Weddings have “too many cooks in the kitchen” to begin with when it comes to making Wedding decisions (B&G, MOB, FOB, Future Mother-In-Law etc). The last thing anyone wants is now the Guests figuring they too can call the shots.
May look good at first glance to a young couple, who have never been to a real Wedding before… but a potential nightmare for anyone who really knows how complex Weddings can be to start with.
Overall this idea IS A FAIL
@EffieTrinket: Haha! Now I’m imagining getting corporate sponsors for a wedding… For the first time as husband and wife, Mr and Mrs X, brought to you by Pepsi! You could have an ad page on your programs, use a RedBull vehicle as a getaway car, promotional t-shirt cannons at the reception, sell naming rights to your firstborn, QR codes on the invites…
@fishbone: “In a few generations I believe it’ll be perfectly acceptable for the guests to pay at least some of the direct costs of the wedding and for the couple to ask for that as their gift (people already feel fine doing this for housewarming parties where you ask for $10 to help cover the keg or ask all your friends to cook a dish).”
Oh my goodness, I hope not! I’m all for modernizing social rituals and doing away with stuffy old traditions that are no longer really relevant, but I hope we don’t see basic principles of common courtesy (like the notion that it’s NOT okay to beg for money from your friends and family) falling by the wayside!
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