Post # 1
I have my first OB appointment and anatomy scan on Friday at 20+5. I have been graduated from my fertility clinic for a little over 8 weeks, and have not seen my family doctor during this time as he does not see his patients through their pregnancy.
Because I have not had any ultrasounds in a while, I am scared of what might happen or be discovered during the anatomy scan. At my last ultrasound with my clinic, I had a large bleed around the pregnancy. Thankfully I have not had any bleeding or spotting since midway through my first trimester.
I wonder things like, “What if the SCH has not resolved?” “What if I have developed a cyst?” “What if baby is not big enough?” “Have I been eating enough for baby?” “What happens if I go into labour early?”
Additionally I am worried about being disappointed if the baby’s sex is not what I’ve hoped (we want two kids and really hope that one is a girl). This baby will be so loved and it has been quite the journey to get to this moment. I think these feelings stem from comparing my pregnancy to that of friends and also feeling inferior for having to go through IVF.
I wish I could relax and be happy and excited, instead of worrying about my scan.
Thank you for any replies, have a great day.
Post # 2
Try not to think about what could go wrong (even though it’s easier said than done!). And trust that you’re in good hands and whatever happens, you’ll work through it with the medical staff and doctors as you did earlier. Be strong and know whatever happens you’ll handle it.
Worst thing anyone can do: compare yourself to others… everyone’s journey in life – pregnancy, home buying, schooling, careers, etc. – is *always* going to be different. Best to trust your journey and know you’re doing all you can to reach your goals!
Post # 3
I think this is totally normal. With my first pregnancy, I didn’t even have an ultrasound until 19.5 weeks. I was so nervous that we would see something terribly wrong with the baby, like something incompatible with life. I was worrying for nothing, and I tried to keep this is mind with my second pregnancy. With this one (I’m due in May) I had an ultrasound at 8 weeks and the next at 20. I was still nervous to make sure everything looked normal but reminded myself that worrying is not only unpleasant but will not change anything. The anatomy scan is so amazing- seeing the baby looking like who they are and seeing all the anatomy is just incredible. Try to enjoy it, it’s such a special thing! FWIW I wanted a girl so much before we started TTC. Now I’m pregnant with my second son and couldn’t be happier. I love my first son so, so much. He’s sweet and wonderful and we have so much fun together. I can’t wait to meet my second little boy! All the best on Friday!
Post # 4
Well truthfully, the anatomy scan is to look for problems, it is not necessarily going to be a happy relaxing event. You are just being realistic. I did a 12 week organ scan (at 10.5 weeks) and was told they think my baby has a neural tube defect. So definitely not a happy visit, and it’s been a horrible week waiting for a second scan to see how things are going.
However, AFTER the scan goes well you can be happy because they have ruled out a lot of problems. After the scan and the okay from the doctor you can have significantly more peace of mind that you will have a healthy baby.
It is probably more enjoyable to blindly assume everything will be great and the 20 week scan is about finding out the gender but in actuality it is a very serious appointment and they are there to find problems (or rule out problems) not just create a happy experience.
Post # 5
Maybe it would help to think about the fact that whether you saw your baby via ultrasound or not this whole time, it wouldn’t (most likely) change the outcome of what you will see at your anatomy scan? I totally understand the fear, I was super nervous for mine while everybody else was just wondering about gender. I also had a SCH that was fairly large, but did in fact resolve by the anatomy scan. My fingers are crossed that everything goes well and little babe is perfectly healthy!
Post # 6
While I have seen that attitude plenty on wedding bee (bees actually calling the anatomy scan the “gender reveal ultrasound”), I don’t think that is the OP’s main worry here- it’s that there will be a problem with the fetus or a SCH. I know that’s how I felt- we chose not to find out the sex with my first pregnancy and we already knew the sex at the anatomy scan with my second (since we’d done a genetic screen to check for trisomies). While the anatomy scan is checking for problems, I do think it’s possible to enjoy seeing the baby and its anatomy, especially as you are (hopefully) reassured that everything is normal.
Post # 7
don’t practice your emotions – there is no need to worry until the doctor gives you a reason to! I would write out all your questions and have them ready so you don’t forget to ask anything. Mine took about an hour (I have an active fetus that wasn’t particularly cooperative for the cameras) and it was fun to see everything.
If you’re worried that you’ll be disappointed about gender there is no rule that you have to find out. We’re waiting until delivery to find out if it’s a boy or a girl. I’m hoping we start off with a girl, and husband is hoping for a boy, but we both know we won’t care at ALL in the delivery room because we’ll just be happy the kid is here and healthy. Bonus: it drives everyone else CRAZY when you don’t find out the gender muahahaha
Post # 8
Thank you very much, this is great advice. I appreciate it. 🙂
Thank you very much. That is so true, an earlier scan wouldn’t change anything for us either. Even our chromosomal abnormalities test results will not be definitive, and if our baby were to have one of these conditions, it would not change things at all. I have heard that there is such a special bond between little boys and their moms. I wish you a wonderful remainder of this pregnancy and thank you for always being so helpful in your replies.
Yes good point about the anatomy scan. I guess these scans are a good tool to have in preparing for and becoming aware of any potential issues. I hope your second scan goes well, I can imagine how you may be feeling.
Thank you very much. Have a great day.
Great advice, thank you. My (many) questions are ready, and hope to make the most of my appointment time with my OB. How exciting to wait until delivery to find out whether it is a boy or a girl! I’m too much of a planner, I don’t know if I could be team green. Have a great day.
Thank you again ladies, I look forward to updating after my anatomy scan. 🙂
Post # 9
haha – I’m a planner too! That’s why no one can believe I’m waiting. I remind them that the important things to plan don’t require gender knowledge at this point. We need to do a will and choose guardians, set up a college savings plan, choose a daycare, and buy diapers either way. Good luck at your scan!