Scared to tell family/ bf that I’m expecting

posted 3 months ago in Pregnancy
Post # 16
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Like PP have said, just focus on telling him first, and then the two of you are in it together and can share your news together.

In your original post you said “problem is I skipped a few steps”, and unless you were the only one actually having sex, YOU didn’t skip a few steps, both of you did.  

Post # 17
Member
1221 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

lovelydia :  Firstly, congratulations bee! 

I don’t think the card or anything else “cute” is appropriate in this situation.  I think that is only appropriate when a couple has been actively trying, then it’s already somewhat expected by the other person, it’s not a suprise. 

I think you need to sit your fiance down and tell him, as soon as physically possible.  Then take the cues from him.  If he seems like he needs time to process, give him space.  If he wants to talk about it straight away, then talk.  You’ve already been able to process to a degree, so I think it’s kind to give the same courtesy.  

From there, you make the plan together about telling parents, the future etc.  He’s your partner, you guys are in this together.  This doesn’t have to be decided on straight away, depending on how far along you are, you will have plenty of time to sort everything out. 

It will all be fine and everything will be worked out, I know more people who have had their first baby in this situation than the ducks all in a row situation, and they have done just fine.  You just need to have your partner there for you as soon as possible.  Trust me, it will be a big relief. 

 

Post # 18
Member
444 posts
Helper bee

Congratulations 😊❤️ I’ve just had positive pregnancy confirmation from my doc and am so anxious about telling my parents too! It’s ridiculous because I’m 35 with two older children (from previous marriage) and I’m married. We have a few instabilities in our life at the moment and I know that will give them reason to not be happy about the news. They are stressheads and my mum can be quite irrational and mean (lucky yours isn’t)! My dad is also going through a stressful health issue and the last thing I want to give him extra stress. He literally worries about every tiny thing, even when it’s good news, he’ll find a reason to worry and stress. I want to just tell them ASAP, my little family (husband and kids and I are all really happy) but I just don’t need any shit. Typing this I think I will book in for an appointment with a therapist (I’ve seen a few times before) soon to get a reasonable perspective on this. If your family is rational and calm unlike mine then I would just tell them ASAP and get it over with 😊 best of luck x

Post # 19
Member
3859 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

YOU didn’t ‘skip a few steps’, you BOTH did. It’s both of your baby. You should be in this together. Tell your bf ASAP. Don’t stress about the exact way to tell him, just tell him. And then you can tell your parents together. They might be shocked at first but I’m sure they will rally round and adapt.

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