(Closed) Seating chart: What do you think about being seated near the back of the room?

posted 13 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
138 posts
Blushing bee

No – someone has to be seated there and I wouldn’t feel insulted. I went to a reception once tht was large, but mostly family. My friends and I (who were not family members) were seated at a table in the back corner of the room. It was just fine – there was a good view of everything, dinner was served so no waiting for our table to be called to the buffet. I wouldn’t put immediate family in the back of the room, but other than that, I don’t think guests mind.

Post # 4
65 posts
Worker bee

Our caterer actually told us that they feed the back of the room first because it makes cleaning up easier, so sometimes that works to their advantage.  Also, I know a lot of my friends who have gotten married put their "Fun table" toward the back since we were all drinkers/laughers and then we wouldn’t disturb anyone else – no problem there.  And Surgie is right, someone has to sit in the back.  Only time I was EVER insulted about my seat at a wedding was my sis-in-law where we had a good table near the bride and groom but were the last table to be called (mind you, her grandmother, brother, and close aunt and uncle were at the table too)…..and even that wasn’t her fault becuase the caterer didn’t listen to her.  As long as you don’t serve immediate family last, I think you’re good! 

 PS – we’ve opted to just let people sit where they want so we don’t have to even think about who might be insulted by what.  takes the pressure off….but you could only do it with a buffet i think.

Post # 5
800 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I don’t mind sitting near the back one bit, especially if I can still see and hear everything that’s going on.

Post # 6
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I don’t mind sitting at the back as long as I’m in good company. I think that makes all the difference! 🙂

Post # 7
483 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I think it is definitely fine! Just make sure you put the right people there. I would hope most would not be insulted, but ya never know.

 One quick story about being insulted, though. I went to a wedding where I was the significant other (of over 2 years) of one of the groomsmen. Apparently the couple thought it was OK to seat the SO’s of the wedding party and the "young people" (recent college grads, mind you) next to the bar. Well, that would have been fine if the bar wasn’t in a HALLWAY. There were a few open doors, but I didn’t see or hear any of the dances or speeches. As long as you don’t do that, I don’t think anyone will have a problem

Post # 8
331 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

i would be fine with it, but do think carefully about who you’re putting there… there was a scene at a family wedding when a touchy guest had a problem with being seated near the back and tried to confront the bride in the middle of the reception and have her seat changed. the bride’s parents intercepted the guest and calmed her down, but still… if you have someone who might be like that on your list, better to prevent problems by seating them a little closer.

Post # 9
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

Wow, worcesterbride’s story is pretty scary!  Hopefully none of your guests will react like that…I mean, somebody has to sit in the back, right?!?  I wouldn’t worry too much.  I was seated in the back when I attended the wedding of one of my childhood friends.  I was at a table with other girls who I hadn’t seen in years!  We enjoyed being in the back b/c we could talk and catch up away from all the commotion of the dance floor.  Plus, it wasn’t as loud, and we were closer to the bar!  :-)<span class=”postby”>

Post # 10
1485 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

I suppose that if the room has a clearly "undesirable" end, I might be a little miffed.  Nobody is crazy about sitting right by the wait bar or doors to the kitchen.  I have a little trouble envisioning a situation in which I would be upset – but our venue didn’t really have any "back" of the room.  The room was long, with windows all down one side, and about three tables wide.  We sat about in the center, and there were tables all around us.  The dance floor and the bar were at one end, but I wouldn’t automatically think of the opposite end as the "back" of the room.  Likewise, I wouldn’t think of the side opposite the windows as the "back" of the room.  The cake cutting, and the toasts, also were placed at one side but fairly centrally located.

Maybe if you have a clear "back" of the room, its more of an issue of how you are setting things up?  Try putting your head table near the center, and see if that changes how things feel.

Post # 11
26 posts

I went to a wedding 2 weeks ago and we were seated the back of the room.  We all laughed it off because we knew the bride and groom did it for two reasons: everyone at the table would be loud and obnoxious AND none of us would care that we at the back.  We sat closest to where the food came out so we were the first table to get their food and if there were extra plates untouched they gave them to us.  The servers even gave us an extra bottle of alcohol that was left over!

 The best part?  We snuck out while everyone was dancing and no one noticed when I took the centerpiece with me.

Post # 12
2 posts
  • Wedding: July 2010

Whereas I do think being seated in the back can mean you are ‘less important’ it doesn’t have to and I wouldn’t necessarily be offended by it. I guess it depends on the circumstances. 

I’ve been to two weddings where we were seated in the back and probably because we were less important or rather that we weren’t very close to the couple getting married.

In one case I don’t even know why we were invited since we really didn’t know them, I guess since they were close friends with Fiance borther and SIL and the groom’s parents were close friends with Fiance parents they invited us as well… Anyway, I wasn’t offended at all by sitting in the back.

The other time we ended up in the back corner was FI’s cousin’s wedding. Yes we were family but not very close. I think Fiance hadn’t even seen his cousin forabout ten years – in fact he didn’t even recognize her when he met her at the meet-and-greet the day before the wedding! Again, we felt OK about sitting in the back (not great seat, we couldn’t really see the toasts and the slide show) – I probably would have felt bad if we had gotten ‘good’ seats and friends they were closer too had gotten the ‘bad’ seats.

Post # 13
370 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

We weren’t offended sitting in the back. The couple was a coworker of my FH so we planned on leaving a little early anyway. Just make sure you sit people who know eachother together.

 I’m not sure what your venue is like but we are kinda "Spreading the action". We are having a buffet so the food is one side, the dance floor in the middle, and the cake on other side of the room, that way everyone is close to SOMETHING.

Post # 14
1929 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

It never occurred to me at all until my now husband said we had to move his boss from the "back" table so he wouldn’t be offended.  I thought it was silly that anyone would be, but I guess some people will care and others won’t.  I am not really sure how you tell who is who though!  I think the best solutions to be safe are #1 older people (to keep them from the loud speakers) or conversely #2 your younger, more likely to party, possibly single friends, who probably could care less!

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