Post # 16
If it was just a party with the guys, fine. But if he were calling attention to the fact that it’s a bachlor party, No.
Darling Husband said he had girls pinching his butt randomly on the night of his. Now that we’re married, only I may touch him!
Post # 17
MrsGatito: Hah, exactly! His butt is mine and mine only.
Thanks everyone, I definitely needed the perpsective. I’m going to have an honest chat with his brother and make sure nothing crazy is planned (though they all say no…don’t they?). Of course I do trust my Darling Husband enough though to not feel nervous about it!
Post # 18
I think you should just let it happen, presumably you’ve discussed boundaries before and going out with his friends shouldn’t cross any.
Strange that they’re calling it a bach party, but it just sounds like a night out.
Post # 19
Am I the only one who thinks going to a strip club is not just a night out? I’m sorry, but I think they’re totally gross and one of the reasons I married him is because he is the kind of guy who does not like strip clubs and has only been a few times in his 30 years.
Post # 20
They are dudes, they are calling it a bachelor party instead of saying ” it’s a party to honor him” or making up some other cute name. The short of it is they missed his first party and therefore they want to throw another party in his honor (which in the dude mind, they call it a bachelor party.)
Personally, I think the idea is thoughtful. However, regardless if it were his first bachelor party or not, if you two have certain boundries, whatever they may be, those need to be respected at all times. As long as you two are on the same page, then I would kiss him and tell him to have a fun night out with his boys. 🙂
Post # 21
Nope. Take a look around the bee… a lot of shit happens at “roudy” bach parties and I wouldn’t want to deal with it since you’re married and he’s not a bachelor. Hell to the no if you’ve got a young baby and are staying at his parents house. That’s just odd. Sounds like the brother and friends are using it as an excuse to see strippers and if it was really a party to “honor” your husband who doesn’t like strippers, there wouldn’t be any.
Post # 22
I don’t really see the problem with it… or the name other than the lack of ” ” if some of my friends can’t make it to my hen and wanted to throw me a “hen do” after the wedding I’d be touched. I also don’t see why being engaged or married makes any difference to whether your partner can go to strip clubs or get lap dances really. Either it’s crossing your line or it’s not. My fi can go to a strip club on his or anyone else’s stag now or later but knows that lap dances are too far.
Post # 23
I don’t see why people are all “but he’s not a bachelor anymore!!” I’m pretty certain you were in a relationship with him BEFORE the wedding so he wasn’t a bachelor then either lol
i wouldnt be cool with strippers before or after the ceremony lol so that’s up to you guys really
Post # 24
These guys want to get away from their (pregnant) wives and/or their children for a night of debauchery and they’re using your husband as an excuse. They’re making it a surprise because (based on what you’ve said) they know he wouldn’t be interested if they brought the idea up w/him and because they think “bachelor party” is a holy term that no wife/gf/fiancee can interfere with.
Post # 25
Just seems so inappropriate. I mean it would be fine and understandable if they wanted to go out to a bar or something to celebrate, play some pool, have some beers. But a full on party because the guys couldn’t make the real one? That’s just ridiculous
Post # 26
I say No Way, not because I object to the rowdy parties or expense— if that is what he wants to do, or what his friends want to do for him, I’m not ever going to deny that opportunity. But calling it a bachelor party and behaving like it’s a bachelor party is silly once you’re married. You’re not a bachelor any more. Move on with life. It’s all too common these days for people to invent so many false occasions to just extend the wedding, and you need to just learn to accept that the wedding has come and gone, and celebrate the present and future, not the past. Anniversaries? Great! Make every one as special as you want! But for the other 364 days of the year, well, life doesn’t revolve around your wedding any more. Move on.