(Closed) Second Visit

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
342 posts
Helper bee

It’s too early still to go a day without thinking of her. Of course, you still picture her doing the things you are enjoying with you. It’s what you know. Don’t expect the pain to disappear over night. It’s OK to hurt for awhile. After my divorce, it took me MONTHS to not cry everyday and YEARS before I could think about dating. Give yourself time.

Post # 4
Member
114 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@Packers12:  I’m glad to hear you’re taking control of the situation. Going to therapy, starting a new job, and having fun with friends sound like solid, healthy steps!  One fine day you’re gonna look around and notice how many cute girls are out there on the slopes, too. Wink 

I don’t really have any advice to ask your therapist, except maybe for strategies to redirect your thoughts if you feel you’re spending too much time thinking of your ex.  But how much time is too much is best left for you and the professional to decide.  Of course old habits die hard, or as one of my favorite songs puts it: “Healing with time/is like watching paint dry”.

Personally, I’m proud of you, dude.  You’re gonna get through this.

Good luck tomorrow!

 

Post # 6
Member
3885 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

It’s your therapy session. Bring up what YOU want to bring up, not what strangers on the Internet tell you to bring up. It’s much more effective as a healing tool if it’s meaningful to you, as opposed to others.

Post # 7
Member
688 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Just talk about whatever you’re feeling that day. Or the progress you’ve made since your last session. I don’t think there are specific questions we could give you to ask…its all about just exploring your emotions. Good luck, I know this is a difficult time, but you will get through it!

Post # 8
Member
271 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I agree with everyone else – just bring up anything you feel like talking about in the moment.  

Also, when I’m hurting it comforts me to know how people have gotten through similar situations. Your therapist will not be able to tell you specifics about her other clients, but she may be able to tell you generally what has worked for other people to cope with loss.  Stay strong, sending positive thoughts your way.

Post # 10
Member
3424 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Packers12: Hi again:)

 It’s ok to put your feelings on paper but DO NOt send this letter to her. You need to heal yourself, you’re broken right now. go to your therapist and ask her this question. Tell her you are having extreme difficulty coping And it’s getting to the point of anxiety and obsessive thoughts. If you are on medication, I would look into a possible change. What you should be focusing on right now is acceptance. Like I’ve said before, you can and WILL get through this! believe in yourself

Post # 12
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Birdi:  +1 to this. @Packers12:  Go ahead and write the letter, but don’t send it to your ex. Bring it with you to your theraposit and read it to him/her. or if you don’t have time to write it before therapy, just tell your therapist about all the urges you’re having to reconnect with your ex. I am so proud of you for going to therapy!!

Post # 14
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Packers12:  As a PP said, you can write a letter as long as you don’t send it! But I don’t think that’s really going to help you because you are framing the letter as a way to get her back, not as a way to move on.

 

I’ve been following your posts and I think you are expecting to get over her way too fast.  You seem frustrated that you aren’t over her yet but that’s totally normal! Just take it one day at a time and try not to dwell too much on your negative thoughts. 

 

ETA: I don’t mean this to be harsh and please keep posting if that’s what you want, but I’m not sure if your posting on this site is really that healthy. To me it seems kind of like you are posting as a way to continue dwelling on your ex and keep rehashing your break-up, etc.  I would just think about your own motivations for posting on here and make sure they are healthy.

Post # 15
Member
3424 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Packers12:  I know, it’s going to be tough for you to let go…but you will:)

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