Post # 1
- Wedding: June 2019 - Tacoma, WA
My curious question of the day:
Would it bother you or make you feel suspicious to learn that your SO has social media account(s) (Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, etc.) that you didn’t know about? As in, you knew of one account (or set of accounts) and somehow learned there were more?
Post # 2
I guess it depends on the account, what it’s used for, and whether they’re actively hiding it or just didn’t mention it. Like if my husband had two full and active facebook accounts, one that I’m aware of, and one that I’m not, that would be suspicious. But if my husband made a linkedin account and didn’t tell me, that wouldn’t be a big deal.
Post # 3
I guess that would depend on whether they used that account or not and if they do, what’s it used for? Was it just an account made a long time ago that they forgot the username/password and never use, or is it active? If it’s active, is it an account for a hobby? I recently found out that my husband has a FB account under an alias that he uses to trade Dragon Ball Z cards lol.
Post # 4
I said yes b/c my fi is adamant about not having snap or insta even though I’ve asked him about it.
So it would be really out of his character to have them suddenly.
Post # 5
- Wedding: November 2019 - Canada
It would bother me that I didn’t know about it. I think the purpose of the account would really determine whether I was suspicious of it. If I found out that SO had a twitter account that I wasn’t aware of for his business, that would be understandable. But if he has a personal “secret” account, I would wonder why he needed the extra account and why it had to be secret. In that case, I would be highly suspicious and would want him to show me/give me access to the account (we have an open door policy on messages & social media, so this wouldn’t be an extraordinary request)
Post # 6
If he’s keeping it a secret, as in purposefully hiding it from me, yes that’s a problem.
If it’s just a random account, he doesn’t use much or just never mentioned I wouldn’t care at all.
Post # 7
When you say you knew of one account or set of accounts, do you mean you knew they had facebook but didn’t know they had twitter, or you knew they had this facebook account but didn’t know they had 3 other facebook accounts. If you knew about facebook because you are on facebook, and it just never came up that they have twitter, this isn’t a big deal.
If you’re talking about socs I think there are two ways for this to go:
1) They have exactly two fully active fb accounts. One you know about, they friend their family, co-workers, friends, whatever the normal friends for them are. Then their second account has nothing but bots, exs, and scantily clad women. Or, they’re smart and its not quite a skeleton account, but it doesn’t have their regular bf friends and they use it to message women.
2) They have several accounts. Probably because they get banned alot and so they keep accounts on rotation. You know about this “set of accounts” but they forgot to mention one. Because they can’t keep track. These accounts will have roughly the same friends and roughly the same purposes.
It is also possible that he has a account that he friends co-workers because people get pressured to do that, and one where he speaks uncensored. In this case I think you should be friended on both, but maybe he’s dumb.
Post # 8
Depends on if he was trying to keep it a secret or if it was something that just never came up. Like, I don’t have a Snapchat but I know my husband does even though I don’t have one because he’s mentioned it in passing.
Post # 9
It depends what it’s being used for. I started a secondary instagram account a few years back to post my fitness-related pictures, but have stopped using it. I don’t know if my fiance knows about it because I had stopped using it once we met. So something like that wouldn’t bother me.
Now if I found out he had an additional Instagram/Snapchat account and was actively using it and actively hid it, then I’d be suspicious and want to see what he was doing.
Post # 10
I trust my husband so this alone wouldn’t make me suspicious. I know my husband had 2 FB accounts—a personal account and one for political stuff. He very well might have other social media accounts because he likes to get involved in political things. What kinds of accounts are these? Do you have other reasons to suspect your husband?
Post # 11
It’s kinda ridiculous that so many of you are nitpicking this. You know what the OP means. If my SO had a fake or secret social media account in addition to his regular one, then yes, I’d be suspcious.
Why do people act so dense??
Post # 12
Intentionally kept secret- yes, if my husband had that type of social media account I would be suspicious. I’m not talking about forgotten about accounts, an old account that is never used, or an account I just didn’t happen to know about.
Post # 13
There are people who actually use social media to promote their businesses. Thus, having more than one account wouldn’t get my attention. And some people create different personas for different interests, especially when there is incongruence. Thus, you have the Harley rider who is seriously into breeding canaries.
It would all hinge on what is being done with those accounts. What is being posted?
The secretiveness is the other giant red flag.
Have you gone on the sites do see what your SO is doing?
Post # 14
- Wedding: June 2019 - Tacoma, WA
Thanks for all the responses everyone! I was really just curious to know how Bee’s would respond to something like this.
So, here’s the story behind the question. My cousin’s hubby wanted to send her a snapchat over the weekend, something they sometimes do to play with filters and such but maybe just every few months or so at random. So he sends her a snap but she never got it because they weren’t Snapchat friends, apparently, even tho they were before. So he asked for her username to add her onto his account again, but she says her name didn’t come up in the list when he put in her username, and she couldn’t see his new one either (blocked?). She still had his other account on her list of friends, though. So, naturally she asked him why he has a completely different account than the one he had been using. He brushed it off saying he “must have created a new Snapchat account” when he reset his phone because he couldn’t remember the password to the other one.
She asked me if I thought this sounds suspicious, and yes, I do think it sounds a bit suspicious, honestly. Now, he has been known to not remember his passwords before. However, rather than just adding her to this new account and being done with it, he figured out his password to the old one and logged back into that one. Which, to me, also seems a bit weird.
The real kicker to this, though, is that he has had inappropriate convos with other women online before, a while back, but as far as I know they worked past all of that and there haven’t been any issues in years.
It could certainly be that she just doesn’t know about it though.
Post # 15
Woof, well until I got to your 2nd to last paragraph I was gonna say that it sounds like an innocent mistake and he probably just forgot his old password, no big deal. But given the fact that he has a history of shady behavior with other women (do you know if that was on social media?), I’m less inclined to give him the benefit of the doubt here.
ETA: Also, it sounds like she was blocked from his new account? That is also super suspicious.