(Closed) Seeing him for the first time… then leaving.

posted 5 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2808 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

when my Fiance came to see me for the first time, neither of us wanted him to go home. in fact, he had a panic attack and was almost escorted off of the plane before they even took off. it was horrible for both of us. it sucked, a lot. i’m not gonna lie to you. i wish i could tell you it got easier. but the leaving never got easier.

however, it’s totally worth it once you’re not long distance. and distance makes everything stronger.

Post # 4
Member
1465 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I will say that the first initial meeting is so overwhelming and the thought of meeting him after months of phone calls, IM, and Skype  and discussing your hopes and dreams and they are become a reality. I personally think we develop a stronger relationship because you have time to really get to know each other and the bond gets stronger.

It is painful but if you have developed a strong relationship it only makes you both more determine to work through the distance because each other knows the value of the other.

I hope when you meet it will be everything you both wanted and needed in your lives. I send you a hug and my support because I am in a LDR also. My Fiance is in Afghainstan right now and our relationship is getting stronger everyday because we have made a committment to work through our differences and the loss of not being together physically.

BIG HUG

Post # 5
Member
4284 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I have never attempted a LDR, but just wanted to wish you luck on your trip!

Post # 6
Member
1408 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@xSparr0w:  if everything goes well of course you’re going to miss him! Just think of this first meeting as a defining the future type of thing because you never know what you want to do next until you meet this person face to face. When my Fiance and i met for the first time we spent 3 days together and when it was time for him to go home i was so saaaad. it sucked! but if everything goes well you will see each other again. We moved in together just a few weeks later. 

Post # 7
Member
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’ve never had a relationship with someone I’ve never met before so I can’t offer much advice but good luck and be safe! 

Post # 8
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

FH and I “reconnected” through facebook.  We went to high school together but never really spoke to each other.  We became friends on facebook while he was living in Alabama and I was in Indiana.  I know this isn’t the same, but it is hard to say goodbye.  Especially when you don’t know what the future holds.  I am excited for you though!!!  I couldn’t imagine traveling to another country to meet someone like that!!!  Good luck!

Post # 9
Member
342 posts
Helper bee

Leaving gets harder EVERY TIME. You would think, you’d start to know the routine of leaving, and what to expect, but every time it gets harder.

We’ve been long distance from the start. Although when we met, it was in person. It was at a wedding in his hometown (six hours from mine). So, it’s a little different than having never met in person.

The best advice I can give you is to always have a return planned BEFORE you leave. Either an ACTUAL DATE he will come to see you, or an ACTUAL DATE you will return to see him. Leaving with a “see you sometime” makes it REALLY hard.

Good Luck! Let us know how it goes!!

Post # 10
Member
51 posts
Worker bee

We couldn’t stand to be apart after meeting, a week later he moved down here. For 2 years. Been in a LDR again for 8 months, leaving was SO hard. It hasn’t got any easier for me, 🙁

Post # 11
Member
51 posts
Worker bee

@itsmle:  SO true. We don’t have a date and it makes me soo sad.:(

 

Post # 12
Member
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My Fiance lived in Texas and I lived in Missouri when we first met. It was SOO hard when he first left. I knew I liked him before, but being in person was so much better. I cried the rest of the night after he left. It never really gets eaiser unfortunately, but how can it, being away from the one you love? I still cried when I went back home over Christmas. That being said, I wouldn’t change it. It shaped our relationship in a way that I don’t think living in the same place could. Good luck to you! 

Post # 14
Member
3692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

He came out to visit me first.  He asked how long he should stay.  I wasn’t sure we would even get along in person, so I said just a few days.  We knew right away once we were together in person that we would eventually get married.  I bawled my friggin’ eyes out when I had to take him to the airport.  

The next month I flew out to see him for 10 days.  A month after that I quit my job and moved to be with him.  

Post # 15
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

He came to see me first, and we decided that we’ve  been pen pals for so long, that we would have fun hanging out together, so book another date.  I fly to see him.  That really helped with the leaving thing. 

 

Post # 16
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Best of luck! It is very romantic and exciting. Don’t worry about flying back. If all goes well, you won’t have that much longer to wait until the next visit. Do you every talk with him about moving closer to live in the same country?

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