Post # 1
Member
6 posts
Newbee
Hi all,
I’m new to this site and was so excited to find that so many people respond honestly to posts!
So here’s the situation: My fiance is concluding his residency here in the Jackson area at the end of June 2018. We are hopeful that we will be moving to one of the Carolinas at that point. Well, we just got engaged. Yay! But it also throws a new curveball for the move. I’ll share my brainstorming with you all and I’m hoping you can give me some honest insight on planning and which choice may work best.
I am thinking that we will set a date for the end of September 2018. My thought is that this way I can have most everything planned before the move. My concerns with this (that I have run across so far atleast) are that needing dress alterations near the date and any near-date issues that may come up would be somewhat difficult to manage from afar. I do have a great maid of honor that would be in the area that I’m sure would help… just don’t want to ask a ton of her.
Originally we had planned to get married in May 2019, but I’m concerned about planning everything from another state. All of our family is in Michigan, so we want the wedding to be here. I’m very detail-oriented (not full bridezilla but definitely on the high-strung end), so I just want to figure out the option that would be least stressful and most practical.
Has anyone else had a big move near their engagement/wedding that could share their experiences with me and offer any advice?
Post # 2
Member
14 posts
Newbee
We got engaged in December 2017 and are moving July/August 2018. Since we are from 2 different areas in Illinois, I knew we would get married near my larger family, but would be planning a wedding from another state. I found it too costly and chaotic to travel back and plan from afar, so we opted for a destination wedding a few weeks before we move with immediate family. When I was reaching out to vendors for dates later this year, they wanted to meet in person and I would be traveling back to do so – I just couldn’t justify the cost. I, too, am very Type A/high strung and knew I couldn’t handle the additional stress of planning that along with a new marriage and move, so I had to prioritize.
Can you have a discussion with your Maid/Matron of Honor about availability prior to the wedding? Sharing your concerns and asking what she might be able to assist with may give you peace of mind. I’d recommend trying to sort as much as possible out early so that you know what is taken care of, then just confirm/follow up with vendors and contacts throughout the process.
Congratulations on all the exciting things!
Post # 3
Member
732 posts
Busy bee
Congratulations! And welcome 🙂 what’s the area like for weddings where you are? In busy areas venues and top photographers will be long booked up for key wedding dates in September already (think Friday/Saturdays) as it’s less than 6 months away now and still “wedding season”. It will depend on how much you want to DIY, how many people you want to invite (are your VIPs available for potential dates?) And what kind of day you want. It can be done!
Post # 4
Member
2829 posts
Sugar bee
We moved overseas (DH immigrating to my home country) two months before our wedding, which we had in my hometown. I actually found it super easy to plan from overseas with the help of the internet, and two visits during our 18 month engagement. None of my family or friends really helped us plan either. I do agree with PP that things might be fully booked for September 2018 by now though.
Post # 5
Member
1298 posts
Bumble bee
I planned internationally (lived abroad, planned wedding on family holiday property NOT in hometown but in home country roughly ~3 hr drive from hometown).
Because our wedding was being hosted on private property we had to bring everything in, so I hired a planner for minimal support. Basically she was present on-site whenever the property had to be viewed (~5 times because ultimately there were concerns about the septic system so what should have been 1 visit turned into LOTS).
Honestly, if we had held the wedding at a hired venue I don’t think the planner would have been necessary. Photographer, hair/make-up, DJ, etc were all booked via internet. I had hair/make-up trial and caterer taste-test while in the wedding-local for a long weekend.
I did take a week off before the wedding to be based locally to oversee final prep, but everything else was done internationally with the help of technology 🙂
Post # 6
Member
6 posts
Newbee
sseaking : Thanks so much!! I will definitely start with a chat with my Maid/Matron of Honor before actually booking anywhere! And the destination idea has definitely been thrown around. My fiance has a big family, so he wants to at least do a reception back home. And at least for now my thinking is that at that point I might as well do it all together.
ukbea : Thank you! I’m in mid-Michigan, so the wedding season is definitely a bit shorter due to weather. We have looked at a few venues and have actually found a few with openings for September! Lucked out since we are looking at a more unique type of venue (greenhouses). That’s a great point about checking dates with the VIP’s early!! Thanks so much for the thoughts.
sapphire27 : Thank you for sharing! Awesome to hear that it didn’t drive you nuts! Can I ask if you went with a venue where things were more built In, or did you work with separate vendors? (Like dj, food, cake, bar)
Post # 7
Member
6 posts
Newbee
TravelingBride31 : Awesome!! A planner is something I wouldn’t have thought of but could certainly be a good backup if things go south! Can I ask if you had alterations done to your dress? If so did you do them all overseas? Or on your visits? And one ladt question, how did you manage your bridal party attire? Pick it out online? Or was your bridal party with you overseas? Thanks for the help and the bit of comfort that it’s doable!
Post # 8
Member
2829 posts
Sugar bee
hayleya : I had a really great and easy experience planning so it can definitely be done!
Our venue was pretty all inclusive (ceremony and reception spaces, hotel rooms, getting ready room, all tables/chairs/linens/cutlery/plates, day of coordinators, bar service, catering) which was a godsend. We briefly considered getting married somewhere outdoorsy like a field or forest, but pretty much immediately changed our minds after thinking about renting plates, cutlery, chairs, generator, portapotties, etc. etc. I would definitely recommend a more all inclusive venue if you are planning from far away.
We booked our venue without seeing it in person first. Also booked our photographer, offiicant and ceremony musicians after skype conversations.
We also did a lot of DIY, including flowers, cake, all decor and DJ+speakers (family friend who offered and was already invited). After we moved I wasn’t working for the 2 months before the wedding, so had lots of time to plan our DIY parts (and my mother was a great help at this point too).
I brought my dress back on one of the visits to my home country (stuffed in a suitcase on the plane), and got it altered in the two months before the wedding. My bridesmaids ordered their dresses online from a regular clothing site (not specifically for bridesmaid dresses), they were all scattered across the world.
Post # 9
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
I’d suggest a planner/coordinator. If you’re confident with most of it, but just want someone to help out with last minute things, you could hire a “month of” coordinator. Which is exactly what it sounds like: someone who helps with the month leading up to and the day of the wedding.
You could also have your dress arrive to your new home when you order it and get the alterations done there. Flying with it might be a pain in the ass, but it’s definitely doable.
Post # 10
Member
6 posts
Newbee
sapphire27 : bumblebug : I really appreciate all of the info and tips!! I’m already feeling more confident about either option.
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