Post # 1
We’re getting married April 30, 2011. While we’ve chosen our wedding party, the various other positions that are involved in a Catholic Mass aren’t filled yet (i.e. readers). How early should I select these people?
Post # 3
Hahaha my Future Brother-In-Law asked me to read – actually, I think he might have told me I was reading – the day before the ceremony. The minute we got out of the car, after a 3 hour drive.
And he didn’t have a copy of the reading to give me, so I’d get it in the morning, when we got to the church. So far so good.
Then, I had to check with the priest, precisely when to go up to read. He said, I’ll call you up. Sound so. What does the priest do? Puts his head on his chest for a little contemplation sleepy time. Me nearly bouncing in the seat, waiting for him to wake up. And then it was a really long reading. Aaargh!!
So basically, ask a couple weeks in advance, I think. Or earlier, if you like to get boxes ticked. Just sit down with your list and try to find plenty of people that wouldn’t be mortified doing it. You know your guests, there are usually a few that don’t mind.
Post # 4
We just asked our readers this week. Nothing like waiting until the last minute, but they were all thrilled to be asked.
Post # 5
Oh good–so, in no way am I behind in not asking people then : ) Just wanted to make sure! Thanks!
Post # 6
@aunt pol: Love your story! I asked family members waaaay in advance because they are not very reliable, but still family. It depends on the prep time a person might need.
Post # 7
I asked my friend last week – wedding is in October. I have known him for the last 23 years so I wanted to include him in the wedding :o) Plus, we were boyfriend/girlfriend in 4th grade (he is gay so we find this hysterical now).
Post # 8
I haven’t asked any of mine or even finalized readings and readers (have an idea though). Plan to do it after shower and wedding invites are sent. We just met with the priest about it a few weeks ago so couldn’t really do it sooner and now I can’t seem to get to it. Wedding’s in Oct. so we have some time but I do like to check things off my list.
Post # 9
We asked my husband’s cousins to read like a week before the wedding 🙂 I emailed them the scripture readings, and they had plenty of time to practice!
Post # 10
Hi, I get married on the 8th January 2011. I have actually just picked my readers. (three) – To read the first, second reading and prayers of the faithful. Mind you, I’ve had a bit of hiccups along the way. I asked my two sister in law’s if they could read, cause I wanted to make sure I included my Fiance’s family in something, cause my bridesmaids – I am having three, my sister, my cousin here and my cousin over in Italy. One of my sister in law’s is angry/upset that she wasn’t picked, and my other sister in law is angry of the fact that I didn’t pick her sister. Anyway so I asked them both if they would like to do a reading, and both of them said no. One said ” I don’t do public speaking ” and the other one said ” I decline your offer ” in an SMS. Rude if you ask me.
I have now picked my aunty over in Italy, my Godmother and a friend! and all there are just so proud to read. =/
Post # 11
I am thinking about asking one of my friends relatively soon, just because I really want her to be involved, but don’t want to add any more bridesmaids! She keeps offering to help with my planning, so I would really like her to know she has a role in the wedding soon 🙂
Otherwise I don’t think you need to ask until a month before if you don’t want to!
Post # 12
We are about to ask FI’s cousins to do the reading even though we have (exactly!) one year to go. This is mainly because he is very close with his cousins and we don’t want them to feel left out because we already have 7 BMs so putting them in the bridal party would be difficult (also, I’ve never met them before, so it seemed weird to include them in my bridal party though I’m sure they’re great!!)
Post # 13
Like PPs said, however long you’d like to give your readers time to prepare. I’d recommend choosing them before you get your programs ordered so you can include them in it; another deadline could be before you talk with your coordinator so she’ll know what readings are being read & who to cue in. You’re definitely NOT behind in any kind of etiquette deadline, no worries!
Post # 14
We did not finalize our readers until we approached the rehearsal. That is when you will need to have them there. other than that, there is no rush. However, you should give the readers some time to accept the invitiation to do so. Don’t spring it on them last moment.
Post # 15
If I were a reader, I would have liked to have as much time to prepare as possible. I wouldn’t need like a year in advance, but I’m just a nervous public speaker. 3-5 months I’d say 🙂
Post # 16
We are having the first meeting with the priest next Tuesday, after we confirm the number of mass helpers we need we will be asking.