(Closed) Self-Conscience.

posted 8 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I too have suffered through eating disorders, and I still have horrible self-esteem when it comes to my body image, so I can relate. The only thing that I can offer you is to try to see yourself as others see you. When you look in a mirror, try viewing yourself from a strangers point of view. You are a very beautiful woman, and your gown looks beautiful on you 🙂

Post # 4
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

oh sweetie, what im seeing in the photos is a beautiful healthy and vibrate young woman – you look amazing in that dress and i love how your back looks, you are a stunning bride

take care and love yourself, you deserve it!

 

Post # 5
Member
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

i think your are gorgeous and have an amazing body – one that others would envy!  but i totally get how you feel and i know it helps to  have people tell you are wrong, so you are TOTALLY wrong!

Post # 6
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Hey girl, that is so great that you not only were strong enough to recover from the effects of your illness as a teen but that you continue to be conscious enough of the disease to recognize that it is giving you an inaccurate body image again. You admit that what you see is not the “real truth.” It takes a lot of bravery and strength to battle those voices inside.

I am sure that the stress of wedding planning is probably contributing to you feeling this way and having to struggle with the symptoms again. I know how it feels to be insecure about your body. i have never had an eating disorder, but I have been chronically underweight for most of my life. Now that I have a wedding to plan, I feel under even more stress to gain weight so that I won’t feel self conscious of my body on my wedding date.

To be totally honest, your body = my goal weight. You are seriously the perfect size for your figure. Gorgeous curves and perfect proportions. I truly, honestly, envy you! And I know I’m not alone in that.

You look absolutely beautiful in that dress. I hope you can shake these icky, unfair thoughts that there is ANYTHING wrong with your body. You deserve to feel like the amazingly stunning bride you truly are. You’re in my thoughts and prayers! aloha nui<3

Post # 7
Member
218 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@His Lil SantosGirl: now that dress fits you beautifully, shape-wise and all. you have nothing to worry about in my opinion

Post # 8
Member
747 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

i am so sorry that you are having these feelings. i understand they are out of your control & taking away from what should be a very special time in your life. i know how that feels all too well (i didn’t even want to go buy a dress for fear that people in the store would see me and think that i didn’t deserve to have anyone marry me because my body would disgust them!). i’ve read some articles about what they’ve coined as ‘brideorexia’, and it’s frightening just how common it is. anyone that has struggled with these types of feelings/behaviors in the past is likely to struggle with them again while planning their wedding.

i don’t a quick fix- i wish i did. i can tell you that it’s not uncommon, but that even though it’s common doesn’t mean the feelings are based in reality. i can tell you what i see in the pictures: a beautiful blonde woman wearing a beautiful dress that defines her small waist. long arms with tiny wrists and toned shoulders. a nice smooth back, without any fat back to be seen. and a perfectly proportioned chest, that i’m sure your Fiance is a big fan of;) you look like a princess in your dress, and i’m sure everyone who sees you will think the same thing. imagine your Fiance face on your wedding day, he’s a lucky man!  i hope you are able to be done with the dress soon, put it aside and try to enjoy planning the rest of your wedding.

Post # 9
Member
558 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

You look absolutely amazing! You look healthy and slender and that dress is terrific on you. But, I know that hearing that won’t always make those feelings go away.  If you feel comfortable, it might be really helpful to see a therapist once or twice to help guide you back to your happy place.

Post # 10
Member
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

You look lovely.

However, and I am as serious as I can be about this:  If the wedding is bringing up these feelings again, I think you ABSOLUTELY should start seeing a therapist skilled in eating disorders ASAP…don’t wait for things to get out of control.  Wedding planning is stressful enough, without having to deal with issues like these on your own.  As you know, eating disorders are serious and can be deadly.  It is so admirable that you’ve overcome your problems and that you are doing so well, and I would hate to see you backslide at all.  So please don’t feel like you need to be strong and do this yourself.

I work with patients with eating disorders as part of my job, and so obviously feel very strongly about this.  Take care, and again congratuations!

Post # 11
Member
514 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

People who have never even had body issues have these feelings when it comes to their wedding because its a day you are in the spotlight so I think the insecurity is normal but you look awesome in your dress from a stranger’s perspective so I’m your sure your friend and family will feel it even more!

Post # 12
Member
756 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’ve had a long history with eating disorders, and I’m having the same feelings that you are in relation to the wedding and the attention it brings. All I can suggest is to focus on all that you have accomplished — your eating disorder does not control you anymore. You are healthy and beautiful and should celebrate that! You deserve to have your wedding day be one of the happiest days of your life — try not to let your negative feelings get in the way.

Post # 13
Member
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

You look fantastic! Weddings are stressful enough without being able to appreciate how beautiful you look :(. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to talk to someone about this, whether it’s your mother at first or your therapist.

Post # 14
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

You look amazing in your dress!  Try not to let those voices in your head get you down!

Post # 15
Member
548 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@His Lil SantosGirl:

You look like a princess to me 🙂 I don’t know what you see but I see a beautiful bride!

Post # 16
Member
6351 posts
Bee Keeper

Oh honey, I’m so sorry you are feeling this way. You look great! The dress fits your body so perfectly. 

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