(Closed) Self-invites…two in 24 hours!

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

That’s terrible! Who does that? It’s one of my worst fears. No one has the money or space for stuff like that. I can’t believe the second set of self-invites is planning on attending even if they don’t get an invite. Nuts! Good luck sorting this out.

Post # 4
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Some people have some nerve!! Well I would not worry about the friend as you don’t seem to have any contact with him at all except this suprising random invitation, so it won’t affect you too much to not invite him!

But that mother of your friend is different, as she might be negative about not getting invited with people you know – not to mention is seems from your FI’s answer that he basically agreed to inviting her!

So I think you should invite one and not the other if you can. If you really can’t, maybe you can ask your friend to explain things to his mother.

In any case, I would suggest you practice a standard answer when people say things like this, like “Well we’re still reviewing our guest list as xxx (the venue is small, our family is large, we’re having an intimate wedding…) but thank you for the enthusiasm”.. Well, you can probably find better standard answers online, but you get my drift 🙂

Post # 5
811 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

My entire office (only 7 people) is convinced they are all invited and think I’m joking when I tell them we unfortunately can’t. Our hall only holds 90 people -including vendors my family is 54 people alone so there’s no room for co-workers.

…They also seem to think they can complain about the fact we aren’t having any dancing!!! Its 3 in the afternoon and I don’t like dancing…AND YOU ARENT INVITED so stop worrying about it!

Post # 6
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Oh, that’s horrible, I hope they were joking!

We had one person invite herself. She got lucky and made the cut because I discovered that we weren’t meeting our venue’s 150 people minimum.

One of FH’s coworkers is actually complaining that he has not received his invitation yet.  He keeps nudging FH about it and says that he never received a wedding invitation that late. Really? Can’t you just be happy that you are invited? You already know the date!

Post # 7
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

It is a wierd situation to be in and yet it seems it happens to all of us!  You should just invite them to everything that requires a gift – shower, engagement party + wedding – if they really want to be there invite them to all of it!  ok I know that isn’t right….

I think Lexsy’s advice was good, have a prepared response 🙂

Post # 8
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@kermie: Hahaha, that’s hilarious in a not really funny way. How annoying!!

Post # 9
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m not inviting any of my co-workers but 2…and those are people I consider friends.  I work at a college that has 5 campuses.  I work at a the smallest campus with about 10 immediate co-workers–none will be invited.  The 2 that will be invited are friends who I got to know when I worked at one of the other campuses before I came to the campus that I’m currently at (May 2009).  It just makes sense to me.  Our guest list, which is pretty much set in stone, is at 43 (which includes 3 kids).  We’re on a small budget and it’s OUR wedding; I’ll invite who I want to invite! People can complain all they want but I’m still going to have a blast!  🙂  

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