Post # 1

Member
35 posts
Newbee
Has anyone in PA done a self-uniting marriage?
Me and my fiance had someone lined up to marry us and found out a few days ago that he passed away. I have been in panic mode ever since I found that out. I haven’t had much luck finding an ordained minister to do our ceremony. I emailed a bunch of people and met with a few and they are either too expensive or we aren’t feeling a good vibe with them.
The original guy that we had booked told us about this self-uniting marriage and after this week I am really thinking about doing this. I asked my sister if she would do the ceremony for us and she said she would be more than happy to do it.
Has anyone done a self-uniting marriage? Or can share your experience with me on obtaining your license.
Post # 3

Member
520 posts
Busy bee
- Wedding: June 2014 - Italiano\'s Humble
I have no idea if it’s anything like Texas, but here, we recognize “common law”. IDK if that is similar? Here, you have 3 options.
1) Obtain license, traditional ceremony
2)No license, but there IS a paper a the clerk’s office you can file, that says you agree you’re husband and wife. It is legal to change your name, all the other stuff. BUT some insurance companies don’t recognize it.
3)basic common law. living together for 6 months, joint living/finances, introducing one another as your spouse(not Fh or Fw, but “this is my wife/husband Cheetah”.
My son’s father and I, opted for the 3rd, but we did have a wedding and reception. Our family was aware. It started as his offshore schedule NEVER allowing us to get our license. Then, it ended as us thinking we just didn’t require the paper. Everyone pretty much considered us married, as from beginning til end, we’d been together since 05, and it ended it ’11.
Either way you decide to go, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to offer you more state-specific advice, BUT I do hope whatever decision you and your FH make, is an exciting one that works for ya’ll! Congrats, and happy planning!
Post # 4

Member
9076 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
I’m curious. What’s the difference between a civil ceremony and a self uniting marriage? Wikipedia doesn’t post specifics, other than it has Quaker origins and that you need two witnesses to sign.
Post # 5

Member
6111 posts
Bee Keeper
Is self-uniting like marrying yourselves? In Colorado you can do this – as in you don’t need an officiant or witnesses. I’ve known a couple to do this. Frankly I think it’d work best if you had no guests (aka eloping).
Post # 6

Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
Info on the self-uniting ceremony for peeps from outside of PA:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-uniting_marriage
Basically, it’s a Quaker ceremony that is recognized legally (by the state) as official…and you and your spouse “officiate” your own wedding, thus you don’t need a priest, judge, etc.
I don’t know much about it, other than that it’s a bit more expensive for that type of marriage certificate.
I think you should go for it…why not?!
Post # 7

Member
242 posts
Helper bee