Post # 1
We’re getting married 45 minutes from where I grew up, but no longer live in state. We are having the wedding near the beach and have rented a large home on the water for the weekend. Since it is a touristy area and peak season, hotels and rentals are quite pricey and most require a 3 night minimum stay. We booked a large home and some smaller cabins many months back to house our bridal party right by the ceremony site. But, because many of my side have family/homes 45 mins or 1hr away, they have decided not to stay in the cabins, either opting to make the drive, or using rewards points or staying at cheaper chain hotels 20-30 mins away.
I have been trying to be really flexible about everything, I guess I’m just a little sad that none of the girls are staying in the house. With tax, our cost is $150/room per night, and we said that we’d subsidize the rooms to $100/night so it was more affordable for members of the bridal party (and their dates) to stay there. I think that the price is more than fair, since you can’t find anything cheaper than that in the town, but is there a way that I can nicely insist on a couple of them staying there?? Should we subsidize it more?? We can’t pay for some and not for others, and can’t afford them all, so paying outright is out of the question… Please let me know if you have any suggestions…
Post # 3
So your BMs are planning to stay in their hometown the night before the wedding and then drive back afterwards also?
Post # 4
I’d let them stay at their family homes or cheaper hotels if its within a reasonable distance. They really are the best ones to judge if they want to drive back and forth. Is there a reason you want to insist on the bridal party spending money on a room when they have a place to stay that is likely free or cheap, considering all the money they already put towards being in your wedding? At my friend’s wedding, it was 40 minutes from our hometown. Most of the bride’s family, all of whom I am close with, were staying in the town where the wedding was held. They also gave the bridal party that option. Considering my Dad’s house was in reasonable driving distance, I just went home and stayed there to save myself the money. Unless there was a reason that you NEED the bridal party there, I would reconsider insisting that they stay. If they have found another more affordable hotel, or have a place to stay elsewhere, I’m not sure why you would insist on having them stay in the rooms you booked. Being in a wedding is expensive venture, and I’m sure they are all happy to spend money on the necessities, like dress, shoes, etc… I just don’t think staying at the place you want them to is necessary if its going to cost them more than the other options they have available to them.
Post # 5
Thanks for the responses. You are right, I should just let them figure out what is best for them — they know that staying in the main cabin with us is an option, and if it is not optimal for them, then I’m not going to push it. We have other out of town guests that we can have stay in the rooms, so I’m not worried about being stuck with all of the cost for the rooms, I was just hoping to have at least one of my gals there in the cabin with me, but I’m a big kid now, so I’ll be just fine 😉