(Closed) Send a card or no?

posted 7 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Member
2385 posts
Buzzing bee

 I would do what you think is appropriate (honestly, I personally would probably send a card, but do what is right for you). I feel like time can change a lot of things, and you want to try and keep some communication open with SIL. They told you “congrats” on the baby; tell her “congrats” on the wedding and move on. 

Post # 3
Member
46332 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It is never the wrong choice to take the high road. The relationship between the two of you and this sister may change in the future and you will be able to hold your head up high, knowing that you did the right thing.

Post # 4
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

Have your Darling Husband send an email back with the words, “Good Luck,” just like they sent to you when you announced your baby news. If they’re the cause of your wedding drama and can’t see the wrong that they did, then they don’t deserve a card…just my opinion.

Post # 6
Member
1506 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Yea, I’d do the same thing. Do the bare minimum, just so you can say you kept the lines of communication open.

Post # 7
Member
5886 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Kill them with Kindness…

Post # 8
Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I’d send them a card congratulating them (the sister only – not the mom).  I’d proably reply to the mom’s email with:  thanks for letting us know.

Send the card to the sister with sincere congratulations – putting aside how they treated you and not expecting anything in return (any like minded kindess for future events).

I think you cannot expect people to change, so you can only control your actions.  I don’t think you sending or not sending a card will change anything any time soon – but, I think doing so, will perhaps be a way of showing that you desire good toward her vs. any bad.  Who knows what her mom has poisoned her mind with… that’s sounds like a very toxic environment to be in.  Perhaps now that she’s getting married and making a life for her own, she’ll be able to free herself from the crazy and make her own decisions about relationships she desires to make (without being influenced by crazy).

Post # 8
Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I’d send them a card congratulating them (the sister only – not the mom).  I’d proably reply to the mom’s email with:  thanks for letting us know.

Send the card to the sister with sincere congratulations – putting aside how they treated you and not expecting anything in return (any like minded kindess for future events).

I think you cannot expect people to change, so you can only control your actions.  I don’t think you sending or not sending a card will change anything any time soon – but, I think doing so, will perhaps be a way of showing that you desire good toward her vs. any bad.  Who knows what her mom has poisoned her mind with… that’s sounds like a very toxic environment to be in.  Perhaps now that she’s getting married and making a life for her own, she’ll be able to free herself from the crazy and make her own decisions about relationships she desires to make (without being influenced by crazy).

Post # 8
Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I’d send them a card congratulating them (the sister only – not the mom).  I’d proably reply to the mom’s email with:  thanks for letting us know.

Send the card to the sister with sincere congratulations – putting aside how they treated you and not expecting anything in return (any like minded kindess for future events).

I think you cannot expect people to change, so you can only control your actions.  I don’t think you sending or not sending a card will change anything any time soon – but, I think doing so, will perhaps be a way of showing that you desire good toward her vs. any bad.  Who knows what her mom has poisoned her mind with… that’s sounds like a very toxic environment to be in.  Perhaps now that she’s getting married and making a life for her own, she’ll be able to free herself from the crazy and make her own decisions about relationships she desires to make (without being influenced by crazy).

Post # 9
Member
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’d send the card – by continuing to be your kind self to the sister, even when she doesn’t deserve it, it may open her eyes to realizing that you aren’t a horrible monster. By seeing you take the high road, she may realize what a toxic person her mom (and by extension she herself) is.

Post # 10
Member
1177 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I would absolutely send back “good luck”!

The topic ‘Send a card or no?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors