(Closed) Sending out invites in 2 phases???

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 4
Member
1991 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Many people have Blist invitees.

The best way to avoid B list invitees from finding out that they are is to make sure that the A list invitees don’t know the B list invitees.

If the A list invitees start talking about their invites to the B list invitees, people will feel slighted.

I would probably space out the invites by about 3 weeks so at least you’ll have some RSVPs back by then to determine how many B list invites you can send out.

Post # 5
Member
5785 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I sent out my invites in phases. I did family/out of towners first and then did locals. Make sure the “B” group is isolated from the “A” group. Our work friends would never ever talk to our families so I wasn’t concerned. I only had one instance where an “A” blabbed to a “B” and I just used my “oh I’m just running behind so the local invites haven’t gone out” excuse.

Honestly, it turned out to not be a big help. We had a 33% decline rate (65% of our guests are from out of town) so I ended up sending invites to all the A’s and B’s.

Post # 6
Member
2600 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

A lot of couples use a B list…. I definitely wouldn’t take the chance on inviting everyone! 

I’ve been planning weddings for years and you’ll have some cancellations but you never know – wait it out and send to a B list if you need to. 

Often once responses start coming back you may not even feel like inviting the B list! 

Good luck!

Post # 7
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

A friend of mine got an invitation this past week for a wedding which is less than a month away and they had not even received a save-the-date.  To me it definitely seemed like they are B-listed.  But I given the small venue I told them it was likely the marrying couple needed to know who of their immediate family would be going first and then they felt okay inviting friends.  It wasn’t taken as an offense to get it late.  However, because of the short notice, they had other plans already.

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