Post # 1
My fiance of one week has proposed we do a private (parents-only, if anyone) ceremony sooner than later and then hold a party/reception in a few months for family and friends. I think that he would prefer to have that moment be between us and he is not one who is outward with his emotions and feelings. I can empathize with this. I think it also would help with jitters (like public speaking, etc).
Have you, or anyone you know taken this path? We could do 25-80 for the party afterward depending on how far out on the friends list we go…
Some questions/worries I have as we make decisions soon:
– Depending on how soon this happens, I may not have a dress for the ceremony…I feel this would take away that special feeling of seeing him for the first time all done up
– Would we hire a photog for that too?
– Not pregnant, but how soon is too soon for this private ceremony? (Thinking party would be May/June)
– Thoughts for keeping party/reception special? Hire same photog? etc?
– Honeymoon after ceremony or reception?
I appreciate any thoughts, my head is spinning!
Post # 3
Both can be special, but I get the feeling that you dont prefer this option, but are exploring it for him.
There are not rules about timing. You can have the ceremony and “reception” whenever you want. However, I personally believe if you have the receptiion later, its not longer a reception and it should be a “marriage celebration”. The difference? Dont expect as large as gifts, and even registsering may be questionable. It kind of says that we are now inviting you, months after the ceremony, because we want a gift.
You could do a very intimate ceremony, and then have the reception for everyone immiediatley following. But the reception is meant to celebrate the marriage that happens at the ceremony and to not include people would upset some. Again0 this is my opinion. Not everyones.
Post # 4
@lefeymw: These are very helpful insights…things I obviously didn’t even think about. I appreciate it!
Post # 5
Know how your feeling, my fiance and i are getting married twice. First wedding is very small just our family, then next year we are having our real wedding all guests invited.
This year i decided to pick a theme, and we are doing that, so no white wedding dress. but i think it will be just a special. and next year we will satnd up in front of our nearest and dearest, and technically renew our vowes. Though not many of them will know that…..means no nerves for hubby and i as it will be a little secret.
maybe you could do a similar thing….