- Bhagya Ari
- 3 weeks ago
- Wedding: December 1969
I’m going to apologize in advance to how lenghty this is going to be. I’m also going to apologize to all the brides who have had to make a decision about their wedding plans in less time than I’ve had – I can’t imagine what that’s like and I’m grateful to have time to analyze all my options. That said, I need some unbiased opinions on our situation. I’ve asked all the people close to us and I’ve gotten a range of responses from “do what you both think is best” to “it’s silly to even think about having a 2020 wedding”… SO needless to say I’m confused lol
Like many 2020 brides, I’ve been in limbo with a decision on getting married this year due to COVID numbers and spread rising. I am located in TX and a lot of our guests are as well. However, a lot of my family will be flying in and some of our older guests (while local) are concerned with the pandemic and it’s effect on their health.
Daniel (fiance) and I differ in the sense that he would have been happy with a elopement before this whole thing started but being the oldest and only daughter, a big wedding is something I’d always envisoned – friends, family, dancing, etc. Anyway, it seems that is not a possibility this year… We are at a cross roads on making a decision since our wedding is in September and invitations need to be sent out and guests who are traveling need to make accomodations, etc. We will postpone for sure if masks are required of guests (currently only staff/vendors need to be masked) and no dancing is allowed. Our original wedding plans included a mix of a traditional Christian ceremony/vows with my south asian cultural traditions/ceremony – so essentially two ceremonies; then followed by a reception. Please help me make a decision or realize the decision I’ve already made subconciously!
a) Sept 2020 vows but family only and redo all ceremony/reception in 2021: no waiting on getting married and exchanging vows! but I’m worried that the second go round won’t be as special for the family that witnessed the first ceremony in 2020. My Mother-In-Law has already expressed this concern – “what’s the point on the second one, just don’t do the party after”. also concerned that our friends will feel left out of the first ceremony and think the same thing about our reception later – “they’re already married, whats the excitement/point?”
b) Sept 2020 Christian vows but family only and then have the big cultural ceremony/reception in 2021: we can get married/exchange vows now and save the sri lankan portion of our wedding ceremony for the 2021 ceremony so it’s different for guests and family at the 2020 ceremony. also, anyone traveling from overseas has a higher chance of being able to attend.
c) fully postpone to 2021: we’ll have to wait longer but hopefully the health risk will be significantly lower next year (not a guarantee, but God I hope so for everyone’s sakes). less restrictions and hesitation from our guests. More time to plan and save.
d) NOT our fave option w/ things the way they are but continue with 9/2020 wedding (no holds barred, as long as we’re allowed to): some people won’t feel comfortable showing up and those that do might be hesitant and weary the whole night. Guests can wear masks if they so choose, except to eat. Dancing will be restricted depending on how everyone feels. Our friends won’t have an issue with anything especially with an open bar BUT our older guests may not.
I have no idea if any of this makes sense on what I’m asking but if I need to clarify, let me know!