Member- feelinghopelessguys
- 5 years ago
anonymous for this post
going to try to make this as short as possible. I have been with my fiance for 5 years,we met at work. In the beginning he told me if I heard he was married it was so the ladies at our job wouldn’t try to talk to him. Come to find out,5moths into our relationship,he was married. Legally seperated and at the point he told me, divorced. He said he didn’t want to scare me off. He is a total sweetheart and we fell in love and moved in after 1.5 years dating. At almost three years he basically up and left me saying he felt like we were roomates and we weren’t going anywhere. This was a shock to me and I begged h to seek counseling with me but he refused. It was tough for me but he said we were done. He stayed on the couch for two weeks but we ended up being cordial enough to make it to thanksgiving at my parents but in the begining of December he moved out. Even though he had moved out we were texting every day and we decided we were going to try to get back together. We spent New Years together and at the begining of Jan he moved back in…only to move back out 4days later saying it wasn’t going to work. I was devistated but I didn’t let him see how much. At the same time,were still texting and talking(he would visit some times so we could talk and about 3 times we did have sex). Things were going well until i saw something on facebook that since December he had a girlfriend. I went on Facebook and was able to see through friends he was saying stuff like he finally feels like a man again and making inside jokes etc. I confronted him and he stated that this breakup was so hard for him and all he though about was me and he was keeping his mind occupied by being with this girl. Saying he doesn’t even like girls like that and she was ratchet(lol) and her family was drama filled. He sweet talked me ladies. I’m a fucking idiot and he broke up with that girl and later in April moved back in with me. I justified ot by saying that we weren’t realy together he was moved out and we were broken up so he could date people. My problem was we were having sex,that made the the other woman,unknowingly. I shouldn’t be placed in that situation. All was well for two years until in September last year some girl sent me a message saying he had been cheating on me for like 5 months. I confronted him and he said girls were making stuff up and always trying to start drama and blah balh. Nobody responed so i didnt have anywhere to take it. Until January this year,i got an email and she basically said he said he didnt have a girlfriend but then admittied he did. And also that he was good about using condoms. Great. I asked for proof,she sent me pics and texts. The pics were underwear( which is a big deal bc we had saved up for him to have surgery on his man boobs because they bothered him so bad. But not bad enough to show a random person). Some of the texts he says aren’t him and she’s making it up but he’s full of shit. It was texts like on his birthday asking for ass shots and the next morning him saying they are on the way back home(away for business). When i checked my phone he really was on his was home at that time. He says they didnt have sex but i don’t believe him. I didn’t see him without his shirt off until the day we had sex and that was 5 months into our relationship so i know he didnt show himself to her without her having already seen him. They had sex. Okay,i don’t have proof about the sex. I told him he’s a piece of shit and i should leave him blah balh any girl with a pretty face blah bal. But that was a month ago. Today, he feel asleep with his phone in his hand. I see a text frome a woman saying “I’m getting in the shower” he responds “yaass” then later “wud love?” from her. I woke him up and said what is this. He looked like fuck,then said nothing now.and he had deleted the history.what! After talking he says he’s told me the truth but he would not let me see his phone. He said one of the innappropruate texts was talking to a girl about the gym and diet tips.he knows that is not what I’m looking for. I said if that’s all there is there then let me see your phone. This went on for an hour. He’s said ita not going to make things better. I said then its going to make things worse and you’re avoiding it. I deserve the truth.i said you are in the wrong right now and you’re not even letting me make my own decisions by telling me the truth. He kept saying that he told me the truth but refused to give me his phone.i said you’re making this into an even huger deal if youre saying nothing is there and he kept saying he doesn’t see how reading the texts will make it any better. Wtf. This went on until he said he had to shit and then he went to the gym. Ladies I’m done. I don’t want to change my whole life but I’m done and i don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I love him so much but from a logical side,i cannot let this be my life. I asked him and he said basically he’s been talking to women our whole relationship but that it was casual and nonsexual. Horse shit. I don’t know what to do. Fml. Fml. Fml. Fml
