- 6 years ago
I am really upst right now. I had a long night arguing with Fiance about sex, or the lack of it. I am freaknig out and tired…I have slept a few hours, and don’t know what to do.
My sex life with Fiance has been up and down for the last little while. We used to have lots of hot, steamy sex and we have worked together for a year and a half. I have had some pretty fantastic sex partners, but he topped the cake. Our chemistry was awesome. Then, he proposed.
We went from 4-5 times a week, porn-worthy sex to 1 time a week to once every two weeks. I am NOT A HAPPY CAMPER.
Also, we have had a few fights during sex (which have not been pleasant to say the least) as he has been sort of there but not during sex. It is an awful feeling. He will go through the motions and his actions literally almost put me to sleep sometimes…no passion from him. This varies and isn’t often, but it happens.
We work together and yes, spend literally almost every waking moment in the same area (we try to give one another space so we don’t kill one another) but you would think with all this accesibility we would have more sex. We don’t. Also, he has stopped instigating sex, so much so that it has becomnig a scorecard for me in my head how many times I have had to come on to him.
I haven’t gained weight, there has been no stress (except recently, but we are worknig through that) things are good, life is good. He tells me I am beautiful every day, he hugs me all the time.
He actually bounced back last night that I don’t hug him enough. He is very huggy and I am wondering if I am sending him the wrong signals during the day?
I don’t know. I am so frustrated and last night, I was very calm, and talked to him about how I feel. He took it in, and said I am not the first woman to complain about this. Great. That first woman was his first wife. I heard stories from him that she started working out like crazy and emotionally cheated on him for the last year..possibly physically. They didn’t have a lot of sex. I figured it was her.
Honestly, unless I am initiating, sex is incredibly boring now and I can’t hide it any more. Fiance said he doesn’t want to leave that impression with me, wants to change, is sorry…but, I don’t know.
Is this normal? help. 🙁