Post # 1
So recently I needed my husband’s co-workers number to help me out. I needed to talk to her about whether or not my husband would be in town tomorrow or if he would be traveling for work. Tomorrow is his birthday, and I have planned something to where I will be showing up at his job with some surprise gifts. They work at a law firm that deals mostly with divorces, and I work at vet office. The co-worker that helped me coordinate tomorrow and kept the surprise a secret from my hubby recently got a new dog. I told him to tell her that if she needs anything for her dogs to let me know and I’ll help her out. Well, my husband told me that she wanted to say thank you for extending the offer to her, and she in turn would help me if I needed any legal services. She stopped mid-sentence though, and laughed, realizing she was suggesting that if I needed a divorce to contact her. My husband is very good natured and is hard to offend. He jokingly said, “So you want me to tell her that if she needs a divorce you can help her out?” and she responds, “Yeah! So YOU don’t have to do it!” I was taken aback by this last part for a minute, because I am not one to joke about divorce ever. I think it’s because I’m hypersensitive about divorce since my parents got a divorce and I would not want that for my relationship. However, I am happy my husband doesn’t get offended easily and didn’t make her feel like crap. I understand what it’s like to have your mouth blurt stuff out before your brain can comprehend.
I was talking with a group of co-workers, and one co-worker in particular said, “I was much skinnier before I got pregnant.” Not thinking, I said, “That was when I was a baby!” I totally did not mean to refer to her weight. I meant that when she was pregnant with her first son, I was a baby. I felt like such a doo doo head. I apologized five million times as everyone else was laughing. Thank GOD she is so good natured and didn’t take offense to it cause that totally could have gotten ugly.
Share some of your stories like this below. I love how hilarious they are. You know, AFTER the fact that the dust has settled lol!
Post # 2
I may not have context or am unfamiliar with pregnant talk because I’m not understanding the zinger you gave her lol. But it happens to the best of us regardless 🙂
My moment of shame happened while I was at work. A really cute, sweet gal I work with was sitting at the front desk. I had just walked in the door and walked up to her and said, “Is it raining outside?”. She says no and I just stand there puzzled. (The reason is because her hair looked wet but was actually greasy). I say, “Oh, I just thought your hair was wet.”. To which she replies, “Nope.”. And after a few more seconds of silence I say, “I’m just gonna walk away now. I’m sorry.”
GAH….that was like 5 years ago and I still kick myself for being such a doofus.
Post # 3
SisterJude: LOL oh God. . .I’m laughing so hard. My comment was something on the lines of, “You were skinny back when I was a baby!” Oops. Shit. That’s NOT what I meant LOL
Post # 4
This one was just super embarassing…
We were out for a group lunch with my co-workers and we had just placed our orders. One of the guys, Peter, mentioned he didn’t like pickles but forgot to ask for no pickles, and I was thinking sweet, I’ll ask him if I can have it!!! Before I could ask, someone started talking to me, so I didn’t have a chance to ask until Peter’s plate was set down. I then blurted out “Peter, can I have your pickle?” Apparently my 15 co-workers are super immature and ALL burst out laughing before I realized what I had said. Boy was my face red…
Post # 5
LittlePumpkin: hehe okay I understand now. Ouch…all you can do is face palm 🙂 and then laugh!
Post # 6
I have twice commented/asked about a pregnancy of two different women who weren’t pregnant. I felt terrible both times and am trying to remember never ever to say anything about a pregnancy unlesss I know for sure. Really neither woman looked huge or anything it was more a combination of how they carried their weight and our conversations that made me think they were pregnant. Ugh
Post # 7
- Wedding: February 2015 - Chapel on Base
When I lived in California I worked in aerospace. My position was human resources. We were having guests and I was setting up lunch. I suggested Black Anus. I was horrified. Luckily I got some laughs and they all decided they wanted to have Black Angus for lunch instead.
Post # 8
Scarlett11: I think I can top that. I have twice asked, “Do you have children” of old friends who replied that they were having trouble TTC. I was so horrified at myself, especially when I did it the second time. I *knew* it was a terrible thing to ask and still I managed to.
Post # 9
I was on a train once, long journey so I was chatting to the lady next to me. We were talking about relationships and she said to me “My straight husband decided he liked ass and ran off with a man” so I laughed, quite heartily. I turns out she wasn’t joking, nor did she find it funny. It was allocated seating and I had to continue to sit there the whole trip, hoping for a hole to swallow me up.