Share your best break-up/moving on advice!

posted 1 year ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
1367 posts
Bumble bee

Definitely look into taking up a new hobby, particularly if it involves getting out of the house. Also, spend lots of time with friends doing fun activities; don’t just have the girls over for wine and talking (but DO that sometimes too!). Everyone here will likely suggest therapy, so I’ll let them cover that. 

Post # 3
Member
3306 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Do the things you love. Also, try new things. Don’t worry about finding a new partner look for new passions. Make time for family and friends. And you will know when you are ready to date again. 

Post # 4
Member
1455 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2021 - Kauai, HI

I like to just start dating again, but it’s not for everyone. Meet new people.  Read, get outside, travel.  Your life is what you make it!

Post # 5
Member
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Aspen, CO

Not sure if the two of you are still in contact but for me, in order to really move on I needed a no contact rule. I’m all for being friends with an ex, but sometimes you just need your space to focus on yourself and really moving on. 

Post # 6
Member
10705 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Cute puppy pictures help.

Post # 7
Member
59 posts
Worker bee

Zero contact. Focusing on yourself—-gym, shopping, out with friends whatever makes you happy! 

 

Its normal to still think about your ex so don’t beat yourself up over it set limits…..example: allow yourself to only think about it at a certain time during the day like your drive home from work. Before you know it you’ll forget to think of it during your drive and you’ll be moving on quicker than you thought 😊

Post # 8
Member
4871 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

Go to the gym and get those endorphins going.

Post # 9
Member
735 posts
Busy bee

My best break up advice:

* Comedy movies & series… anything that makes you laugh

* This is a good time to lean heavily on your closest friends and family members. Invite them over. Go over to their houses. Stay at their houses. Talk to them about the break up, or talk about something else. Be around people who make you feel loved and supported.

* Exercise. Especially exercise that puts you in a good mood like fun dance classes or hikes in a beautiful natural environment.

* Cuddle animals every chance you get. Dogs, cats, horses, any animal you like. Doing so naturally lifts your mood.

* Take great care of yourself. Bubble baths. Long walks. Wholesome food.

* Pamper yourself. Manicures. Pedicures. Trips to the hair salon. Great mood lifters.

* Listen to upbeat music with positive lyrics. Having a good dance around your living room is a great way to burn off a bit of negative energy.

* If all else fails – a glass of wine and a nap. Even if it’s the middle of the day. Don’t judge yourself.

Oh… and switch your phone off and put it in the cupboard for long periods of time if you can. Don’t be tempted to text the ex or answer his calls.

Post # 10
Member
197 posts
Blushing bee

For sure zero contact.  Also totally agree with getting out and living your life and being your best self, but if you feel too beaten down for that at any point, I highly recommend finding a trashy reality show to binge.  Their lives are so unreal that it’s hard to get the sad wistful feeling that you might get watching a regular show or movie where you’re supposed to feel things lol.

Also, this is probably messed up, but I used to literally force myself to stop thinking of him and I stopped letting myself mention him to anyone.  I came up with designated things that I would think about instead when he popped into my mind.  It really helped me stop dwelling. 

Post # 11
Hostess
1622 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Go zero contact with him. 

Do you, find yourself, be single for a bit and know what you want. Take time to enjoy being single and by yourself. 

what really helped me was favourite movies or books, the familiar stories were distracting. 

The most important advice I can give: know and love yourself before throwing yourself into dating again or it can turn into a hot mess (experience in this) 

Post # 12
Member
764 posts
Busy bee

Cry. Absolutely lose it. Shed those tears until you feel like you’re freaking dehydrated and nothing else will come out. And then drink some water, go for a walk with earphones. Listen to music and breathe some fresh hair. Then I go home and cuddle up in bed and cancel my plans for the next day. Open up my TV/laptop and watch some good true crime shows (or whatever genre is your thing.) Order food. If you have a pet, cuddle them. I think the most important thing to me when I experience heartbreak is to be ok with not being ok for a while. 

Post # 13
Member
1339 posts
Bumble bee

Letitbee1 :  Congratulations! You have stopped wasting your time in a relationship that doesn’t work for you.

You have time for self care, watching the movies you want to watch, making new friends and living your best life! 

Post # 15
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee

I totally reccomend getting a makeover lesson and buying some new makeup so you feel fresh and pretty and “new”. 

Also, just cry and let it all out. It’s a hard time for you. I find that the more I allow myself to fully feel and process my emotions, the more easily I can move on in time. 

Hugs! Things will get better.

xo

 

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