Post # 16
emmabird : maybe keep it limited to milestones like every 6 months until age three then once a year. For privacy reasons, this will protect your kid too. Someone with only one recent pic stolen from the internet won’t be able to pick up your child after school.
Send frequent pics via text or email to family if you’re worried about them missing out.
Post # 17
From another childfree and probably less welcome opinion….I don’t need or care to see daily photo updates of your baby. Is it a birthday? Is he/she walking for the first time? I still don’t really care but at least these are monumental occasions that I can appreciate would warrant a photo. For every other daily and not irregular photo update…your potato looks like everyone else’s potato and it’s not doing anything worth mentioning. I would love if certain people I follow would share less.
And I do also think that it’s worth considering this baby might grow up into a person who would not have wanted their photos online. Just because you’re the parent doesn’t mean you should have the right to share their personal life without their consent or understanding.
Post # 18
I’m 5 months pregnant with our first. Whilst both Darling Husband and I have social media (Facebook, Snapchat and Pinterest for me, Facebook only for him), neither of us are very active on it. I can’t see this changing when our little one is born. I don’t have a problem with sharing the occasional photo – we both have friends and family who live interstate or overseas, so it’s nice for them to see what we’re up to on the odd occasion. But will ensure that they’re appropriate to be shared on the internet (ie not embarrassing, not naked, etc). We also have relatively small friends lists – it’s kept to family and friends, not acquaintances and people we went to school with – and are pretty tight on the privacy front. Basically, any photos we post we would be happy for the people who can see them to have physical copies of. That is not to say that we won’t take photos of our baby – it’s just that the bulk of them will be kept just for us or displayed in our home.
Post # 19
- Wedding: June 2017 - A vineyard
emmabird : I am less sure of that. I plan on asking people to be easy and make sure the kid is dressed appropriately if they want to take their own pictures. However I don’t feel like we will have an insane issue with things like naked babies because this grandchild is a double digit so it’s not new anymore. I know my baby will be as loved as the others are but I doubt it will be as obsessed over as first grandkids are other than by my dad since this will be his first and maybe only.
Plus we don’t live near either of our families so probably any pictures taken will be by me only and I can control what they look like. If we lived by family I would worry more over it I think.
Post # 20
I like seeing the occasional pic of kids during like birthdays or important events. Most people I know go way overboard and upload pics like every single day. Nobody cares. I don’t want to see ur kid naked, potty training, sleeping or any other “intimate” details that really shouldn’t be posted online. It’s insane how many parents don’t even consider the consequences or effects of constantly ramming a phone in a kids face and uploading it to the world. And don’t even get me started on these bloggers and influencers who leverage their kids to sell products and make money. It’s like a new level of pimping.
Post # 21
Oh God. I have one social media friend, who is the ex of a cousin of mine, who is a phtographer by trade, and she shares UMPTEEN pictures of her kids daily. It is so freaking annoying. The kids are cute, but for God’s sake do we really need to see every angle of them running around and posing? Or, do we really need to see your sobbing photos of giving birth? One is fine, but 50+ —NO. STOP. Leanr what is rational. Please, we all think your kids are great, but stop slamming us with their every move. It’s not fair to them, or us. Learn some control.
Post # 22
emmabird : I know this was directed to another poster, but we had this issue with our pregnancy and birth announcements. My Mother-In-Law wanted to share the sonogram photo on her facebook page and I said no because I don’t have control over who she is friends with (and it’s literally a photo of my insides!). After the birth a random cousin of Mother-In-Law (who my husband and I have never met, but he is connected with on facebook) downloaded the photo we shared and posted it to her own wall without permission to announce to people we don’t know that her family has a new cousin she will likely never meet. My husband immediately messaged her and told her to take it down and she complied. So far we haven’t had anyone refuse to remove photos of our daughter when asked, but if someone was so bold my husband and I are in agreement that the photo is (a) reported through Facebook since they have a special reporting for children and (b) that person loses access to see our photos. I would much rather keep full control over the photos of her that are shared, but I don’t go so far as to throw a fit if she’s included in a group photo posted by a close friend or family member.
Post # 23
bewitched : “Someone with only one recent pic stolen from the internet won’t be able to pick up your child after school.” I’m so confused – what daycare or school would release a child to someone that just happens to have photos of the kid? I have dozens of photos of my niece, but her mom still had to provide a written note to the daycare center to have me pick her up tonight (and we go to the same center and the teachers know we are all friends!).
Post # 24
Well, it’s to each their own. I don’t really think it’s wrong either way just something personal for everyone. I would hope if a parent’s child grew up and voiced opposition to it that of course their parent would respect that. Though I’m sure a lot of children may not mind especially with how technology is in our society and will continue to develop.
However, if/when we have children, I would not like their photos on social media. My husband and I are both pretty private and rarely upload anything to social media. I would feel even more protective over my child being on it. I recognize though that taking them to family events will result in them in photos so I wouldn’t expect people to not post photos of their event/people just because my child is in one of them. I accept that by attending. However, any solo photos or putting things I send them privately and etc would be an issue for me.
I try to do the same considerations for anyone’s kids on my own accounts.
I personally wouldn’t like for my childhood photos to be uploaded but I know everyone is different which is fine. Honestly, this whole topic is a hard one for me as I know my husband’s side loves to post tons of photos/videos daily on their social media…so, if we have kids, I know it’s going to be a nightmare already.
Post # 25
I am not pregnant but plan to have kids in the future. I hope for them to have no presence on social media, neither of us are huge into it and if you don’t know us well enough to see our kid in real life then you probably don’t need to see them online. I can already predict the issues we will be having already with family sharing our pictures.
Post # 26
I think there is a time and place, but I agree that a lot of people go overboard. I think if you’re posting pretty much every picture/video you’ve taken of your child on a daily basis, you need to step away. I do understand sharing things for relatives, but I think there’s much better outlets. For example, FI’s sister set up cloud sharing for pretty much everyone in the family with a smartphone. Now, she doesn’t need to bombard people on social media with every mundane second of her almost 1 year old’s life – it just shows up on the appropriate audience’s phone/shared photo album.
Post # 27
One of my SIL posts at least 3-4 pictures of her one year old son EVER DAY. Literally every day since he’s been born. We’re around the same age (early/mid 20s) but I can’t understand for the life of me. If/when I have a child I will probably try to limit SM posts and I expect everyone in my family to ask before posting a picture of my child and if they don’t I will ask them to remove it. My family is very spread apart so I don’t think I will ban my child from SM but probably only post a cute photo here and there.
Post # 28
There are many facets to this, I think.
I find it difficult to look at this from the perspective of “how would I have felt”, since social media didn’t exist when I was a child, so it isn’t normalized for me in the way that it is for younger generations. How would my great-grandmother have felt if she had been obliged to be strapped into a metal contraption hurtling along at great speeds just for the sake of getting somewhere a little faster? Motorized travel is now so commonplace that most of us don’t give a second thought to plopping our infants into a car for a quick trip out to grab some milk and eggs, despite the fact that it’s entirely possible for them to not survive the experience.
I find oversharing of anything on social media, be it children/pets/gourmet meals/home renos/random graphics/etc can be annoying, but I feel that the onus is then on me to decide who and what I choose to “follow”, rather than on the poster to restrict their level of sharing simply because it’s too much for my taste.
For myself, I’m not a huge social media user, but I don’t mind sharing the occasional photo and I will do so if I have reason to believe that others on my friend list may appreciate it. I’m also okay with family and friends posting pictures relating to myself or my family provided they are appropriately clothed, etc.
It’s true that a baby cannot give their consent for you to place a picture of them on social media, but neither can they give consent to attend or not attend daycare, receive or fail to receive medical care, ride in a stroller, go to the zoo, or a myriad of other things. As the guardian of a child, it is up to the adult to make these decisions in their stead. Whether these decisions align with what the child would have chosen for itself, had it been of an age to do so, is impossible to know.
Post # 29
I do not share photos of my children on social media. It’s about privacy and security.
Anyone who is close to us, knows what they look like. For close out of town family and friends, we just share text or email photos. We also send yearly holiday cards with a family photo.
Post # 30
I post pictures maybe every few months of my toddler.
We prefer if no one else posts photos of her though, because I don’t know what their security settings are like.