(Closed) She seriously won’t quit….

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
359 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Can you just ‘forget’ to send the invite? If that’s not an option, just stick to your guns. Remove the topic form further conversation, and simply don’t send the invitation.

Post # 4
Member
584 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Or blame it on the Fiance… "Sorry mom, but Fiance and I are both so uncomfortable around him. I know you and dad love him, but if we invited him, it would ruin the wedding day for Fiance, and there’s no way I’m going to do that."

Post # 5
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

is your mother helping you pay for the wedding? Because if she is not then it is not her place to tell you who to invite. But either way I feel like it still is your choice because it is your wedding regardless of who is paying. But some people don’t agree.

Post # 6
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am so sorry that you are in that position. I would just stick to your guns about him not being invited, Worcesterbride is right, if he is going to ruin your day, then he shouldnt be invited. I have a mom who wont listen to what I say either, and its frustrating, but you just need to stick to your guns. Its all about you( and your new husband!!) that day and you should be able to decide who comes and who doesnt.

Post # 8
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

If it’s a friend of your father, can your dad say something to him?

Post # 9
Member
2324 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

You didn’t mention if they were paying, but if they aren’t i would totally say no. Not just no, but HELL NO. The idea of this man creeps ME out! If they are paying and you have to invite him, maybe you could put somebody in charge of being your bodyguard for the night and making sure he doesn’t get close? I smacked an old man with a wooden spoon who was trying to dance with me at one of aunt’s parties. He took the hint… 🙂

Post # 10
Member
2819 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I would just not send him an invitation. Just do not get one for him. Do not order one, do not send one, and flat-out tell your mother NO. If she isn’t ordering or sending the invites, there’s nothing she can do. And if she extends a verbal invite and you find out about it, DISINVITE him right away ("I’m so sorry, but we’re trying to keep it close family and friends — you know what the economy is like — and we just can’t afford extra people"), and make sure that you have the ushers/groomsmen/best man on the lookout for him so that they can kick him out if he shows up.

I like the wooden spoon idea. =) 

Post # 11
Member
3979 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Oooooh no way! My great aunt’s younger husband (I won’t call him uncle) is creepy like that. He hugs me in a way that makes me want to peel my skin off.

I told my mom & grandmother I will NOT invite either of them. It didn’t go over well & I know its unfair to not invite my aunt, but I don’t want to be inappropriately fondled on my wedding day by that guy. I can totally relate to you.

Don’t invite him. Period. Ugh I hate it when people justify it too… "Oh that’s just Uncle D" or "He doesn’t mean it that way".

Post # 13
Member
3979 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

((hugs)) Good luck!!

Eww mom… why is she pushing this? It’s kind of gross, especially if you’ve already mentioned your dislike for this guy!

Post # 14
Member
2819 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Good luck! And remember, if worst comes to worst, you can always address an invite for him, but forget to mail it. 😉

Post # 15
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2010

OH I cant believe she said that to you! She really doesnt get it. I think if she is being a stick in the mud about it, then all you can do is, go behind her back. I think losing the invitation might be a good idea at this point. Another person mentioned bringing your Dad into the convo, what does he think about all of this? Maybe you can find an ally in him, or even have your fiance talk to you mom to really get the point across that this person is not in any way to come close to the place you are having the wedding at.

Post # 16
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I have a guest like that coming to my wedding.  I wouldn’t have invited him but I love his wife and kid too much!

 I plan on pointing him out to our best man and my MOH so that they can step in and rescue me if anything happens.  I haven’t mentioned the guy to Fiance cuz he would kick the guy’s butt if he knew anything.  So hopefully that works.

Good luck with your mom, I know that situation sucks.

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