(Closed) She’s after my man…I just know it

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I wouldn’t let it bother you. As long as you are being your sexy confident self, your man will have no reason to ever respond to her ever so suttle advances. i know i know, easier said than done, cause it’s hard not to be jealous. But truly, if you trust your guy, then you have nothing to worry about. If this woman crosses the line, I’m sure he will kindly but firmly remind her that he is taken and quite happy with his hunny.

Post # 4
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

if you personally do anything, you’re going to look nuts. Even though it’s the other person that is in the wrong. I’d talk to your SO and tell him how you feel and why you feel that way, and ask him to keep his ears open. He may not even notice this is happening. If he does notice and puts a little distance there, she might get the hint. Or he could name drop you all the time until she shut up. But don’t do anything that would make things about you, when it’s not you that has the issue.

Post # 5
Member
472 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010 - Ladder 15 Restaurant

oooh Dramz!  Maybe take your man lunch one day and dress to the 9’s!  Be sure to plant a sloppy kiss on him too, right in front of her!

lol, geez, I have no idea!!  How long have they been working together?  Maybe it’s just a phase and she’ll get over it soon.  Or have your man set her up with a single buddy of his?  Distractions might help!

Post # 6
Member
14702 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

He should say something to her.  I had a woman my FH works with tell him to dump me and give her a chance while I was in the bathroom while we were out for drinks after work.  Really!?  He told her at work the next day he could no longer talk to her nor hang out when she will be there as she was totally inappropriate and disrespectful to us both and that was unacceptable.

Post # 7
Member
1080 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I would share my thoughts with your guy. Just let him know you are uncomfortable.

Post # 8
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee

I think that it’s only natural but if you truly trust your man, then you should let it go.

Post # 9
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Personally, I wouldn’t say anything to him.  She hasn’t done anything inappropriate (it doesn’t sound like from what you’ve said), and because you trust your SO, then it shouldn’t really be an issue even if she had.  He’ll let her know what lines not to cross. However, if you feel strongly about this, then by all means approach him about it, and let him know how you feel.

Oh and please, do NOT say anything to your SO’s employee – to me, that’s very inappropriate.  Let him handle it, if there is anything that even needs handling, which there probably isn’t!

 

Post # 10
Member
29 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I have a bad temper and I’m insanely jealous so don’t do what I would do which is call the office, get her email address and tell her to back the EFF OFF ! I’ve actually done it and FI didn’t get mad at me. He was upset that I was upset that his stupid ex tried to weasel her way back in once her man dumped her ass.

Post # 11
Member
1106 posts
Bumble bee

This is a sticky situation.. on one hand you dont want your man thinking you dont trust him, but on another this woman is being inappropriate. If it were me I would probably talk to my man about it and just tell him how I am feeling. If he tells your sincerely that nothing is wrong and nothing will happen.. then believe it.

Post # 11
Member
516 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I would definitely do as Socks said- make yourself known, BUT NOT PSYCHO knows. Dont attack her or even confront her.. Suprise him there one day or something. Also- Definitely tell him how you feel.

Post # 12
Member
2821 posts
Sugar bee

Yeah I’d talk to him about it and let him know what you’re worried about so he can address it properly. My hubs is doing this joint program in school so he’s around a new set of students a lot and as a good looking, funny guy those girls are ruthless. 

It used to highly piss me off, but after talking to him about it he now handles it fine.  And if someone persists, which they do sometimes, he just ends up keeping his distance.  Usually after a few weeks they get the picture and I can be around them without wanting to slap them.  But until then it’s just kinda funny watching them try to flirt with him and him dealing with it.  So you need to have trust in him and be able to tell him when people are making you uncomfortable.  He does the same for me if his male spidey sense tells him some guy is up to something.

Post # 13
Member
510 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I had a similar situation happen to me…there was a girl that my husband was friends with who at the time was getting a divorce from her husband and “needed someone to confide in” (you don’t have girlfriends?!?!?!?!) but anyway, I let it be known to my husband that it was inappropriate, he didn’t understand at first, I gave him specific instances that she was borderline inappropriate (because she would always play the ‘friend’ role) and I kept telling him about it.  I always kept it light and funny (because I didn’t want to let him know that it really irked me as well)  and he eventually saw what I saw.  he stopped communicating with her, we got married, and then she stopped trying to talk to him.  i think she thought she would try and get one last chance before he got married.  Idk, but she was weird…she even tried to befriend me, like it would have made a difference…I was always polite, but I knew she wasn’t genuine. 

my point being…keep telling your husband everytime she does something that you think isn’t right…and not in a “i’m jealous” of her way…more in a “can you believe her?” way…it might lighten the load on your SO if he can’t exactly see what you see at first…

Post # 14
Member
1154 posts
Bumble bee

I would definitely not say anything to her.  But I might tell your SO if it’s bothering you.  I’d probably be amused and a little irritated a little pleased.

Post # 15
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I would talk to your SO in an easy, not serious way about it. Maybe he doesn’t realize how his responses may come across to a woman who clearly doesn’t get it?

It’s definately good that he’s talking to you about what she says. maybe he needs to tweek his reponses to her?

There is always going to be “that lady” at work…I wouldn’t let it get to you (even though that’s easier said than done!)

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