(Closed) & she's out of it!…

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4693 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I understand that 13 year old girls are very moody. BUT EVERY SINGLE DAY!?!?


Yup, pretty much.  Fun isn’t it?

Post # 4
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

 what is a marriage blessing? I never heard of that is it different from the ceremony?

She sounds rude and petty however I would remind you that she is 13 years old and so don’t stoop to her level or let her get under your skin. You can enfource your boundaries in  a mature way, or ask her parents to deal with it. I think 13 is way to old to be a ring barrier anyways.

Post # 5
Member
3471 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

Let it out, honey– let it out.  

There’s no reason to let their drama and negativity impact you any more than it already has.  She sounds like a very frustrated kid, and it really sounds like the best thing for her is to learn that she can’t tantrum her way though life.  We all go through that phase at one point or another, Just don’t let her drag you back to it.  Let the anger out and move on. 🙂

Post # 6
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Like you said… She is 13.  13 year olds have attitude, and have a lot going on.  Body changes, friends become enemies, the whole 9 yards.  Those are tough years and it sounds like she needs your support right now, not your anger.  I know you were upset with her, but removing someone from your bridal party is a serious thing that can hurt relationships for years and years to come.  This is your cousin, right?  Which means, unlike a friend, you can’t really cut her out of your life either.  My guess is her attitude will be even worse towards you until you apologize.

Post # 7
Member
339 posts
Helper bee

@Mrs.Saez:  Some may find it petty unless they have had to deal with someone like that for a consistent basis! I definitely understand, one of the girls that I had to live with last year was CRAZY and she ended up going completely nutzo after our “friendship” fell apart because she just loved to complain about her “friends” to her other “friends” behind their backs, it’s what she considered “friendship”. Also, my little sister is that way, EXACTLY how you described your female ring bearer!! She’s ALWAYS been like that, and is still kinda like that and she’s turning 16 next month. It’s INCREDIBLY frustrating, and after so much negativity and just downright immature cruelty there’s only so much one can take before they lash out. Needless to say I don’t get along well with my sister. I definitely understand. On the other hand, I’m sure that tweens who act like taht may have some emotional issues going on, but that’s no reason to stand for their behavior. And it’s your ceremony, if people who are negative continuously are told not to come, if they really want to come they would change, and if they don’t change you don’t need them there!! That’s frustrating to deal with, I think I would have done the same thing as you.

 

Post # 8
Member
1042 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Are you sure you want to cause this drama in your family so close to your wedding? Is this really something you cannot deal with for a couple of months? She does sound rude, yes. Your anger seems valid, i just wonder if it is worth the strife this will cause. People can be very protective over their children and younger family members. You say you do not want to cause “drama,” but I’m afraid kicking her out will cause more drama than keeping her in would.

I think you need to remember that she is 13 and you are an adult. You should be the bigger person and continue your relationship with her. If she acts like a brat it will make her look bad, not you. If she continues to act like this, why not speak to her mother/father about it very kindly. I just dont think kicking her out should be your first step. 

Post # 9
Member
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@Follydust321:  This. 

Kicking her out via text message is the way 13 year olds deal with things. You should have talked to her and her parents about this first, especially since they’re still your family. And because you’re a grown up.

Post # 10
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

What are you doing initiating texting wars with a 13-year-old?

Why don’t you take a step back and act like an adult?

 

Post # 11
Member
33 posts
Newbee

Don’t worry about letting of steam, I can Imagine the stress 🙁 the cruddy part of that is that yes, this is a typical 13 year old 🙁 I’m sorry you’re going through this. 

Post # 14
Member
2606 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

She’s a thirteen year old acting like a thirteen year old.  I think you need to take a few steps back from this and look at it from a less emotional stand-point.  She’s being an annoying brat, but she’s family, and she’s a teenager.  Also, kicking her out of your wedding blessing via text was a little…immature.  I agree with PPs that you should discuss this with her parents, and probably with HER…does she WANT to be in the ceremony, or does she feel obligated to be because your family?

Post # 16
Member
3580 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m on the mindset that it is an HONOR to be a part of your wedding and right now she is not behaving in a manner in which she should be rewarded. I would have pulled her too but probably while I sat her down in front of her mother and discussed her attitude.  Yes, she’s 13 years old but throwing your shoes was disrespectful and should not be tolerated. Also, no more fighting with kids over text messaging.  lol

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