(Closed) She's supposed to be my friend :(

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1938 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Bottom line is: THIS SUCKS! 

I am so sorry!

Honestly though it almost sounds to me like this girl has some sort of disorder…. obviously she can’t make her own decisions. Very sad. Feel bad for her and move on. 

Also, there are a ton of weddings that had the same color pallet as mine, and they look NOTHING alike. Mine was Tiffany blue, Chocolate Brown, Sage Green and Cream… There are a lot of different ways to take that… some people OVERDO the color, and some DOWNPLAY the color. 

There is plenty of ways to make sure yours still stands out! 
Hope this makes you feel a tiny bit better!  

Post # 5
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

You cant own a color scheme. Black, white, and pink have been at the majority of weddings I’ve been to, and all of them have been unique in their own ways. I rarely see brides do the same centerpieces or designs. Just limit what you tell anyone about your ideas and move on. 

Post # 6
Member
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

Meh, you know what I remember about weddings? How happy the couple is, not what color napkins they chose. Yes, its annoying that shes done this but I wouldn’t worry about it.

Post # 7
Member
4478 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

It’s rude and weird, but it’s not a battle worth fighting.  I agree that it sounds like she might have a disorder or something.

Post # 9
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

@ohmybears48:  Agreed. Obviously the first order of business is to stop talking to her about your wedding, period. Then you should continue on planning as you were incorporating your unique ideas into the wedding. The wedding isn’t all about the colors – it’s how you use them. Just because she uses those colors doesn’t mean her centerpieces or ceremony decor, etc. are going to look anything like yours. Those to me are the things that differentiate the look of a wedding a lot more than the color. I based my color scheme off of Kim Kardashian’s but trust me, my wedding looked nothing like hers! LOL 

Also, is she still planning the wedding for August 18 now that it’s been moved to a hall? If that’s the case then I really don’t see that you have anything to worry about with her designing an entire wedding in practically two months when the concept for the wedding keeps changing. No one will be comparing your weddings. 

Post # 10
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Keep your ideas secret!

If it makes you feel better, guests are not that observant. No one, I repeat, NO ONE, is going to be saying “Ugh, I’ve seen these colors before.” They are going to be there because they are happy to be celebrating with you. And cake.

Post # 12
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@from_Miss_to_Mrs:  If people comment on the similiarites just say something like “yes I shared my scheme with her and she liked it” or “She and shared a lot of wedding ideas and this one she liked the best from me”

I’m kinda mean so I would find some nice round about way to let people know I had the color first.

Enjoy your day and your love. However, I would cool your jets around her. Be friendly  but I wouldn’t share any more ideas with her concerning decorations, future parties for your children, et al.

I can just see her throwing the exact same BDAY party for her daughter your will throw for yoursInnocent

Post # 13
Member
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Oh I am so sorry! It must be terribly upsetting! 

All bride to bees know how much effort, time and care goes into planning a wedding.

I agree with sweetartMD about your friend/cousin in law to be has some serious problems. I thought people tend to grow out of them after high school!

I definately agree that similar colors can still yield totally different results! Even though you guys have similar colors, it may have a very different outcome.

But honestly…

I think it would be necessary to speak to her. Probably not alone… perhaps with that aunt or someone else to make sure she doesn’t lie through her teeth.

She’s going to become FAMILY and this sort thing may frequent more in the future with  other things and events. Personally, I would choose to speak to her with certain members of the family. Not arguing or fighting…more like  ‘I am a honestly upset that you chose my colors after I told you what they are.  You told me you were asking because you didn’t want it to be same’.

I know you don’t want to disturb her wedding…but it really isn’t cool~ what she’s doing. If she must follow suit, perhaps you and the other can convince her to change the accent color.

Hang in there~ don’t let it get to you. I am sure your wedding will turn out to be superb~!!!! (I mean it’s not being planned in a month with rip off ideas!) xoxo

Post # 15
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Besides the fact that you told her earlier and that you picked out the same bedding, why would you think that she was stealing your ideas? 

If she is your friend and you two have no issues (like real friends shouldn’t), then consider it flattery. Weddings are not competitions, even if you feel she’s making it out to be. 

Post # 16
Member
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

lol wow I msut have been typing away for a while..with feelings! lol when I started to reply there was only 1 reply… after I posted mine, there’s 10 more! lol

 

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