(Closed) Shocked by people's comments about my aunt who never had children

posted 6 years ago in No Kids
Post # 2
Member
3936 posts
Honey bee

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Carolsays:  

Yeah, I hear comments like that.

We have heirs through our siblings, as well. We don’t plan to cut any out of our wills due to their being jerky or anything but you never know. I also hope to have life-long relationships with them because we love them. Hopefully, they’ll enjoy visiting us, too.

 

Post # 3
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

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Carolsays:  Sometimes I say that I wish I had an old rich uncle that never had any kids to leave me a whole bunch of money jokingly, but I’d never say it in reference to a specific person. 

I think it’s great that you keep in contact with your aunt, I’m sure she appreciates it. 

Post # 4
Member
13772 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Unfortunately, a lot of people think it’s OK to say whatever pops into their head. You’re right, it is crass. They may not be imputing your motivation as much as fantasizing about the possible outcome of your actions.  I’d just say it’s not even crossed your mind. 

Post # 5
Member
6331 posts
Bee Keeper

Establishing a relationship with your elderly aunt is good for both your souls. The thought that you’d gain an inheritance didn’t come to my mind at all. 

Post # 6
Member
877 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Based off the title of your post, i thought it was going in an entirely different direction. Never even occured to me it could be about an inheritance. Nor would it if this were an actual conversation i had with someone. I wonder about people sometimes. It is also one thing to think it but an entirely different thing to say it out loud. What ever happened to decorum? Enjoy your aunt as I am sure she is enjoying your presence in her life. 

Post # 7
Member
7552 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

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Carolsays:  I’m hardly surprised. I have had distant relatives ask who I am going to leave all my money to, followed up by their tales of woe over their financial situation vs other family (so a big hint hint).

I have also had relatives assume that I will be happy to be put down as guardian to their kids incase something happens to them since I can afford to look after them since I have none of my own. Yeah no thanks.

I’m leaving my money to my cats (well the no-kill animal society I have decided to bestow their presence on. I kind of feel sorry for the sanctuary having to take on any spoiled rotten furries I leave behind).

People love to count other people’s money (you see it on here all the time) and they can count it all they like but it doesn’t mean they are getting any of it. Unfortunately some people feel entitled to other’s money. Even if you care for someone until their death does not mean you deserve their money.

Post # 9
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2006

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j_jaye:  

+1. I plan on leaving my money and jewellery to my nephew. 

Post # 10
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: South Lodge. 2nd of Dec 2017

We plan to leave our daughters well cared for, so our house will be split between them, the rest of it spend spend spend thats our motto !!!

The one that pisses me off, ……….

Expectants, join the queue this counter is closed ! 

Post # 13
Member
44 posts
Newbee

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Carolsays:  I’m sorry that people’s reactions to your relationship, which clearly brings you happiness and I’m sure brings your aunt a lot of comfort and happiness, has been so rude.

As far as learning about funeral arrangements, does she live independently? With aide service? In a nursing home? I would just ask if she could leave your contact information with the person that checks in on her (or something like that) as a back up emergency contact. Does she have other relatives that she has a close relationship with? You could also ask for their contact information and speak to them directly about this. 

Post # 14
Member
7552 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

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Carolsays:  Maybe ask if you can take her friends out to lunch (or lunch in if mobility is a problem) next time you visit. Pick the one she seems closest to and give them your number and ask that they call if your aunt ever needs anything.

Post # 15
Member
763 posts
Busy bee

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Carolsays:  ugh, that sucks. 

I also have an aunt who didn’t have kids. pretty sure nobody in the family is saying stuff like that about her, but I would so snap at anyone who did! 

she was always my favorite aunt, and I wound up copying her path in quite a few ways (not having kids, getting married “later” in life, travelling a lot). she’s amazing! 

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