Should FI let his mom have her way or make her pick another song?

posted 5 months ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
949 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

No one will remember what was playing during the ceremony. 

Post # 3
Member
4175 posts
Honey bee

futuremrss17 :  just let her have it. It’s really not a hill to die on. It probably means a lot more to her than it does to your fiance. When I got married I told my MIL that all special dances had a 2 minute cap and she insisted on a 4.5 minute version of Somewhere Over the Rainbow. The mother/son dance was longer than our first dance AND my dance with my dad combined. It was a bit ridiculous and people honestly stopped paying attention and went up to the bar in the middle of it since it was so long – but she didn’t care so in the end it didn’t matter. 

Post # 6
Member
6626 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2050

futuremrss17 :  “Or should we just let her have her way?” — This one.

  1. It’s really weird that he’s so opposed to an instrumental. A lot of people deliberately go with intrumentals because you don’t have to worry about sappy or inappropriate lyrics, and it doesn’t matter whether the original is sung by a male or female voice. He doesn’t care what the words are, just that there are some? Doesn’t make sense. 
  2. You’ll already have had the song for your ceremony. That specialness will have already happened and can’t be taken away or undone. So… who cares if she uses the same song later in the night? Nobody will probably even notice that it’s the same song and if they do, why does it matter? What is the repercussion that you’re trying to avoid?
Post # 7
Member
3324 posts
Sugar bee

futuremrss17 :  Let FI figure it out with his mother, I’m sure you have enough on your plate to worry about. 

Post # 9
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

There’s literaly a million songs she could choose from. Here is like a quick top ten

1.  A song for Mama – Boyz II Men

2. Because you Love Me – Celine Dion

3. How Sweet It is – James Taylor

4. I’ll Always Love my Mama – The Intruders

5.  You’ll be in my heart – Phil Collins

6. Unforgettable by Natalie and Nat King Cole

7. Wing Beneath my Wings- Bette Midler

8. Do I make you Proud – Taylor Hicks

9.The First Time I saw your face – Roberta Flack

10.  Your Song – Elton John

 

Why not compromise and give the instrumental song and break it up with a more upbeat/faster song?  I honestly don’t think your guests are going to care or notice either way.  Best of luck on your wedding countdown!

Post # 10
Member
833 posts
Busy bee

 I’m pretty sure your guest won’t even notice the same song is being played twice if its two different versions of the song. In the grand scheme of things to worry about for your wedding day this should be a minor one. I would just let her have her way. Not worth the drama in my opinion. 

Post # 11
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

Oh I just thought of another one!  God only knows by The Beach Boys or my favorite:  Sweet Child O’ Mine by Sheryl Crow!

Post # 12
Member
6626 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2050

futuremrss17 :  Ohh — I didn’t see anything about him suggesting songs and her shooting them down. When you said “he’s been trying to get her to pick a song”, that sounds like he’s asking her for suggestions and not liking any of hers, not the other way around. Sorry for not catching that’s what you meant. I would still just give it to her. If they argue over it, it’s going to put negative feelings into what should be a positive moment. If he’s given some ideas and she isn’t feeling them, what’s the point of trying to force it? You need to give the DJ your songs, so let her have this.

Post # 13
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

He is so worried about finding that song that feels special to him, that he is dismissing what feels special to his mom.

I think he should forget about findig THE song and focus on simply enjoying the dance with his mom. 

In any case, it is his problem and I don’t think there is anything you can do 🙁

Post # 15
Member
1159 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I’d let her have the song. Any one she wants. 

Leave a comment


Get our weekly roundup of the best of Weddingbee.
I agree to receive emails from the site. I can withdraw my consent at any time by unsubscribing.

Find Amazing Vendors