Post # 1
My Darling Husband has been considering going into the airforce for some time now since it would help him get ahead in his career field in the future. He told me a few weeks ago that he has decided he wants to do and needs to lose a little weight to get in and then he would talk to a recruiter and start the process. However, we just found out that I’m pregnant last week. It’s still really early, I’m only 4 weeks along. But now we aren’t sure if it would be best for him to leave before the baby comes or after. My job now has insurance which is what I’m currently using so that’s not an issue. He definitely doesn’t want to miss the birth since this is our first and it was kinda a surprise so I really really need him here. If he leaves before though then by the time he gets back I’ll be almost due and we will have to move to our first station right? And he’s really unsure about leaving after because he doesn’t wanna miss baby’s first few months too 🙁 I just feel bad for him because he knows this is what he wants to do but he doesn’t wanna miss anything baby related and feels bad for leaving me. Ugh, for anyone else who has gone through this or something similar what would you suggest he do?
Post # 2
I can’t imagine why he would run off before you have the baby. His dream can’t wait 6 months- a year? Having you move while still preganant or with a new born would be challenging for you.
Post # 3
I would definitely say ”move before the baby comes”. Personally I would rather handle being pregnant alone than handle looking after a baby or toddler alone. Not to mention that your Darling Husband will love your baby dearly and wont’ want to be away from him/her. I’m currently traveling with my son (we won’t see Darling Husband for a week) and he’s alreasy messaging me saying how much he misses him. When I was pregnant it would have sucked to not share it with Darling Husband but I would have preferred that, given the choice. When you’re pregnant you still have your own freedom, can travel, do things with the girls, have fun… once the baby comes it’s ”looking after the baby 24/7” and even time to have a hot shower is precious. You will need his help and involvement when LO is born.
Post # 4
And I don’t think waiting 6 months/a year changes anything. Young children grow and change sooo fast and if your Darling Husband moves away when your child is young then he will be a stranger to your child when he gets back…. that would be such a shame. I know that people in the military do have to deal with that and I admire them greatly.. if you have the choice I would say ”do it now”.
Post # 5
Is he really okay with being away from you through the pregnancy, missing sharing that whole experience with you? And what if, God forbid, you had the baby early, or had any complications afterwards? I hate to mention it as a possibility, but I’m a NICU nurse and I can tell you nobody ever plans for these things to happen.
Post # 6
Tell him to talk to his recruiter. They know timelines, etc. and are there to give advice on these very matters. When he goes to boot camp could take a little bit of time sometimes. He’d only be away 3 months once he does go, and then has a short time of leave, before his first duty station. But again, the recruiter can help with timeline!
And I can’t say this enough, have a TON of patience. Everything with Air Forcs seems to be “hurry up and wait.” I’d recommend him seeing the recruiter as soon as possible, whether he goes now or later.
Post # 7
- Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom
Can’t his dream wait a year or two? I mean, I couldn’t imagine having to make this choice! It’s too hard!