(Closed) Should I apologize in person?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

No, you totally weren’t out of line! Unless you asked her what her engagement ring cost or something, which would be more of a faux-pas than anything. Nothing you did was worth all of that! I have a tattoo on my foot, and I pretty much expect people to ask about it. It’s sometimes slightly obnoxious when I don’t want to talk about it, but that’s the price you pay for getting a visible tattoo!

Post # 4
Member
502 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Based on what you’ve said I don’t see why she would possibly get that upset. Were other people there to hear what you said (FI or brother-in-law)? Can anyone actually tell you what you said that was so wrong? Maybe she is just self-conscious or is feeling competitive so she thought you were poking fun at her. But I don’t see why you would need to apologize again. I would tell her that you already apologized (when you probably didn’t need to), never meant to offend, and don’t quite understand why she is so upset… good luck!

Post # 5
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think that’s just the price you pay for getting a tattoo people can see…  I pretty much assume that if they didn’t want people to ask they’d put it on their butt or something…

What did you ask about her ring?  Unless it was specific 4 C’s plus cost, I can’t really see what’s so personal. 

I’d be totally confused right along with you.  I would probably phone her, and just say something like how you thought you guys were close enough and really enjoyed getting to know her, and you didn’t realize these things were more personal than your relationship allowed.  Yikes.

Post # 9
Member
6215 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

You should just remind her of what you said and that everyone knows that was it, ask her point blank why she is upset, and tell her to leave it alone. Let her know that next time if she is offended or doesn’t want to talk, let you know. If you don’t stand up for yourself now, she will continue to do this to you in the future

Post # 10
Member
502 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

You should tell her you’re family now anyways (or at least about to be) so you didn’t think you were asking anything too personal… and I would stand up and tell her what you did say and what you did NOT say.

Post # 11
Member
3585 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

@candy11:  gosh, you DID apologize to her in a note.

I can’t see how your conversation was out of line, but god knows young women get all bent out of shape about the silliest things, I see it here on WB all the time.

So it is nice of you to write the note, if this ill feeling goes on and it is important that you have a good working relationship with her, you might talk to her in person or in phone, whichever is doable.

But she sounds like a nutjob for taking offense but even after that failing to accept your written apology.

Post # 13
Member
3585 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

@candy11:  ah, well, she will always be a difficult person, most likely.

In the future speak to her very little, smile smile smile when in her presence but keep conversation entirely superficial. I guess with her that means no personal quesitons including “how do you like the weather today?” haha

Post # 16
Member
502 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@candy11:  What night was that? The night it actually happened? Cause you said she texted you 3 days later right?

Your husband needs to stand up for you and tell his brother that you never meant any harm and DID apologize so they need to accept your apology and move on – what more do they freaking want from you? They are just being ridiculous. I would be livid if I were you.

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