- 9 years ago
- Wedding: April 2009
I have posted other things about one of my bridesmaids.. but I think I have finally had enough. To recap, this Bridesmaid or Best Man is the one that has always been the "its all about me" type.. and I have known that since day one.. she is the one that hasn’t helped the other girls with any details or costs for showers,bach party, etc (which is pissing them off!). she refused to even go try on dresses with us and after we picked the perfect Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses she stalled on going to get hers so long that the store sold out. She told me it was a money issue (which i can totally understand!) so i offered to buy the dress and she could just pay me back whenever she had the money. I finally found her size in a store in florida and had it shipped to my house. It then took a month and 3 times standing me up for her to even come try it on! She told me she didnt have the money and I said "dont worry about the money, I just want you to be part of my special day".. and she said ok.
On a side note, I have long ago learned that when you loan money never expect it back… ruined friendships arent worth $100, right? So that has nothing to do with my frustration.
She never talks about the wedding or asks any questions (other then at my shower last week asked "so when is your wedding again"… omg seriously????? And when I try to give her any information she manages to cut me off and switch the convo to something about her…
My final straw was last weekend though… My BMs and my mom put together a sweet little shower at my parents house. They took care of all the details and invited my FIs relatives and mine and made it abslutely perfect. Surprisingly "the" Bridesmaid or Best Man actually showed up… however, she was the first there are was completely rude to my mother! Apparently my mom let her in and said hello and tried to carry convo and the Bridesmaid or Best Man literally ploped on the sofa and didn’t say one word just played with her phone! Then through out the entire party she didnt speak to anyone and acted completely bored the whole time.. she just sat there texting on her phone. I was so sad and embarrassed she would act that way. Then half way through she came over to me and said "do you wanna leave and go to "the bar".. i got an A on a test and we need to celebrate". OMG!!!!!!! Not to be selfish.. but hellllllo this is my one and only wedding shower and you want me to leave????????
I dont want to sound like a brat.. or selfish but we never even speak any more. I havent heard from her since the shower and I’m worried she is going to act like this on the wedding day and just make me sad again.
I have offered her "outs" in polite ways but she just acts mad and hurt that I would even bring it up.
What do I do? I don’t even feel like I want to be her friend anymore to be honest. She has always been very very self absorbed and I was dumb to think my wedding would be different.. should I ask her to bow out?