(Closed) Should I ask this guy out?

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 31
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I don’t see anything shady about “no need to rush.”

When my Fiance first suggested we should start dating (we were friends first), he added, “We should take things slow, though.” That is just how my Fiance is. He doesn’t like to rush into anything. He needs to think things through before taking action, so he wanted to make sure we had time to feel things out before really committing to a relationship. He said that to make sure that we were on the same page (especially since he knew I liked him, as I was the one who first said “Hey, I like you”). We did take things slowly at first, but after a month or so we were done “feeling things out” and we became serious pretty fast after that. So although he did want to take things slowly at first, after he decided he was all in he went all in.

So basically I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting to take things slowly, or not rushing. It just means that he wants to get to know you properly before rushing into a serious relationship, and then realizing they you rushed into something with someone you don’t truly mesh with.

Granted, some guys who say they want to “take things slowly” really mean that they just want to keep things casual so they don’t have to commit and can sleep around. That is something to keep an eye out for, but it DOES NOT mean you should judge someone automatically for saying this. For my Fiance, he did NOT date or sleep around even at the beginning, we didn’t even have sex until we were official, and he truly meant that he just wanted to take things slow so that we could really get to know each other before we rushed into things. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Good luck, bee! I hope this works out for you, it sounds like a cute beginning!

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