Post # 1
Member
72 posts
Worker bee
hi everyone! sorry this is a long rant!
i am having major problems with my bridesmaid, she is my best friend and i have known her since we were in primary school together. she is a strict vegetarian and completley driving me crazy.
she is refusing to wear a dress in the weddings colour theme so i have changed my colours to suit her, but she is demanding i have her dress specially made as she dosn’t like any of the dresses we have seen. she is refusing to eat on the day of my wedding even though i have arranged for a vegetarian meal for her, she claims there is animal in pretty much all food so she is refusing on the off chance that the cook dosnt know what he is doing, i am still having to pay for her meal.
for my hen do i wanted to do a spa weekend in london, but she is refusing to have any treatments done as “she will not soak in dead animals”, but says i can pay for her to stay in the spa and she will read a book.
On the day of the wedding she refuses to have her hair and makeup done by professionals because they may use products that contain animals or may not be cruelty free. i have even arranged to buy the products she uses at my expense to have the hairdressers and make up artists to use instead, she says she wants to do her own. im not trying to be mean but she does not have a clue how to apply her own makeup (orange foundations, black eyebrows). im just getting sick of her and really starting to wish i had asked my sisters to be bridesmaids instead.
she critisized my wedding ring for having diamonds – something about blood diamonds, and says things like “i have morals i wouldnt ask you to eat a baby!” What!?
i just dont know what to do im stressing more about the complications she is causing than anything of my own, and this is meant to be about my wedding.
Post # 3
Member
2050 posts
Buzzing bee
@penguinslovecrumpets: This is ridiculous. I don’t think you wrote one positive thing about this woman. Axe her from your wedding, and from your life.
Post # 4
Member
343 posts
Helper bee
Yeah this is pretty ridiculous. I woulnt’ have her as a friend, let alone a bridesmaid. I can see accomodating a vegetarian meal option but going to all that extra expense and time is just not worth it. Tell her that you are relieving her of her duties because you didn’t want to put her through the agony of compromising her morals for your wedidng day.
Post # 5
Member
2853 posts
Sugar bee
Yes.
That day is the penguinslovescrumpets show. Not hers.
Post # 6
Member
1732 posts
Bumble bee
Yup. Tell her that you get the sense that this is really stressing her out, and that you think it would be better for her to attend as a special guest. Give her a reading or something if you must placate her, but her behavior is beyond inconsiderate and inappropriate, moving into Personality Disorder Land.
Post # 7
Member
637 posts
Busy bee
seriously…if I were you, I would be done with her at “color theme”. It is not her wedding. She doesn’t get to pick colors. With this much of demand, I seriously will axe her off from my life.
I don’t think this girl cares of your wedding. Do yourself a favor and save yourself further troubles. If your wedding is in 2014, you still have plenty of time to re-plan back to your original plan.
Don’t waste time on this girl.
Post # 8
Member
3106 posts
Sugar bee
toss her. and i hope you’re having a pig roast reception.
Post # 9
Member
343 posts
Helper bee
@mamadingdong: I Second that. (I actually AM having a pig roast) 🙂
Post # 10
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
@mamadingdong: hahaha. Your pig roast comment just made my day. 🙂
Post # 11
Member
1643 posts
Bumble bee
Oh my goodness! PLEASE axe this person from your wedding. I totally respect her morals, but her job is to support you through one of the most stressful journeys in your life. She doesnt need to be this high maintenance !!! You should be making plans to suit and please you, and she shouldnt be making you feel guilty for wanting what you do. I agree with the girls, find her a job in a different department, tell her that her position has been downsized, or that your wedding is moving in a different direction. Whatever you do, get this dramatic whirlwind out of your bridal party and employ someone new!!
Post # 12
Member
2413 posts
Buzzing bee
Um, I would tell her that you will respect her wishes but either a) she can do the research involved to find providers that suit her or b) she can hire her own people/do her own thing at her own expense. This all sounds a bit ridiculous to me, actually!
Post # 13
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
Be done with her! She’s being completely unreasonable. Sounds like you have bent over backwards and she refuses to participate in anything.
You’ll enjoy your wedding much more if you get rid of her!
Post # 14
Member
4192 posts
Honey bee
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
I think having your sisters in your wedding instead would be a lovely idea. I’m a vegetarian, and one of the things that pi$$es me off the most about fellow veggies is when they go extreme, trying to force their believes on other people. It’s your day, your colors, etc., she needs to just zip it.
Post # 14
Member
7605 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
@Cornflakegirl: “This is ridiculous. I don’t think you wrote one positive thing about this woman. Axe her from your wedding, and from your life.”
Well, my work here is done *brushes hands together*. Exactly what she said!
Post # 15
Member
5887 posts
Bee Keeper
i really want you to ask her to eat a baby.