(Closed) Should I be 'given away' or should I walk alone?

posted 7 years ago in Traditions
  • poll: If you were in my shoes, would you walk down the aisle alone?
    Yes : (63 votes)
    94 %
    No : (4 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 17
    Member
    6117 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @FirstComesLoveNZ:  “Giving away” the bride is not a tradition everywhere.  In Sweden, brides and grooms walk down the aisle together arm in arm.  You enter the marrige together so it makes sense to me to walk into the wedding ceremony together, and they view both as equals so there’s no giving away of anyone.

    We did this and I loved it.  H is part Swedish so it was also a way to honor his heritage.

    Here we are:

     

    Post # 18
    Member
    415 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    @sienna76:  Such a sweet shot!!!  Love this idea.

    Post # 19
    Member
    1130 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    My friend and her husband walked down the aisle together as some suggested and it was awesome. My other friend walked with both of her parents, and I will walk with both of mine.

    They won’t be “giving me away” though. They will be saying something about “Who supports this man and this woman in their marriage” or something and both sets of parents will say “We Do.”

    Post # 20
    Member
    6117 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Cecilia37:  Aw!  Thank you! 

    I think we decided to do this option as we were en route to Canada.  The first look happened just moments before we walked in together.  It really got the jitters out for us!

    Post # 21
    Member
    345 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Lots of people (both on this thread and others) suggest the alternative of the bride walking along and the groom meeting her halfway down and then walking together to the altar. 

     

    Fiance and I both tentatively like this idea, but are not really sure how it would work and what that would look like.  

     

    Does anyone have any pictures or videos of people doing this “meeting halfway” thing?  It wouls be really cool to see and get a feel for.

     

    Thanks!

     

    Post # 22
    Member
    6117 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Eradicatereality:  Here I two I googled

     

     

     

    Looks like her BMs followed her

     

     

     

    Post # 23
    Member
    603 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013 - Outdoor

    My brothers are walking me down the aisle, one on each side. They are both honored to do it. I have a similar situation, my parents are divorced and I havent been close with my dad in over 5 years, we go for a year or two without hearing from him, then he will be all nice for a while and then it comes down to a screaming match and stop talking again. This last one he told my brother and I we werent his kids anymore. I am getting married in September so I’m glad that I had already decided on my brothers doing it. Do you think your brother would be more likely to come if you asked him to do something important like walk you down the aisle? But you said you aren’t close so there really isn’t anything wrong with walking by yourself. You are an independant woman!

    Post # 24
    Member
    10363 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    My Darling Husband and I walked down the aisle together. We liked the symbolism of facing marriage side by side, together, as opposed to my being given away.

    Post # 25
    Member
    3183 posts
    Sugar bee

    @FirstComesLoveNZ:  My parents didn’t come to my wedding but even if they did, I was not going to have my father walk me since I have an awkward relationship with him. My Mother-In-Law suggested that my older brother walk me but we have a terrible relationship (DH and I just laughed at this suggestion). I walked myself down and no one gave me away. I am simply independent like that.

    Post # 26
    Member
    989 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I walked by myself.  My mom was a little upset, but this was my second wedding, I’ve been out of the house for 14 years, and she gave me away at my first wedding.  I felt like it would have been weird to ask her to do it.

    I was nervous because I knew if I tripped I was going down in a heap!  But I didn’t, it was a nice moment, and my mom got over it.  I liked it. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 27
    Member
    989 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Double

     

    Post # 28
    Member
    345 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    @sienna76:  Those are lovely! Thank you!  I also feel really imcompetant about my “Googling” skills now because I swear I looked!  I guess I just didn’t get the magic word combo!  FI wil lbe really excited to see these!  I think seeing something that pretty might just sell him on it! Thank you!!! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 29
    Member
    115 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I struggled with this question a lot in the months before my wedding. I have a much better relationship with my biological father than my stepfather but I lived with my stepfather for way longer and he contrinuted more financially to my upbringing. Eventually I ended up with my bio father walking me because my mother intervened and asked my stepfather to escort her. If that hadn’t happened I may have walked alone to avoid any drama. There was no mention of “giving away” in the ceremony though, that would have made me super uncomfortable. 

    Post # 30
    Member
    1489 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I have a similar situation (parents divorced, dad is barely in my life, although he is paying for the wedding)…. and I finally decided that I will be walking alone.  I really wanted my mom to walk me down, but she was worried about that making my dad mad.  And there is literally not enough room in the aisle to have them both walk me down…the aisle is narrow and my dress is big.    And Fiance wants to see me come out in my pretty white dress and walk down the aisle, so having him walk with me is out (and I LOVE this idea, love love love).  

    So walk alone I will.  And besides, all the attention will be firmly placed on me. Where it belongs. ๐Ÿ™‚  

     

    If your Fiance is willing to walk down the aisle with you, I think you should go for it!  Its a far more “modern” tradition and you still get the benefit of a wonderful gentleman to escort you down!  

    Post # 31
    Member
    124 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @NLbride:  Omg I love that idea as well ๐Ÿ™‚

    @FirstComesLoveNZ:  I too don’t have my father in my life. I actually like the idea of not being given away because walking down the aisle would be like “my moment” where it’s just me. This is how I was wanting to do it, but my mother’s Fiance wants to walk me down the aisle, and I just don’t really want it to go that way. NOW, the meeting half way thing I actually MIGHT do because the only important man in my life besides my 2 1/2 year old son, is my Fiance ๐Ÿ™‚

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