(Closed) Should I Be Upset?

posted 3 years ago in Guests
Post # 2
552 posts
Busy bee

The whole story was confusing. Please consider using paragraphs in the future.

What (I think) I’m gathering though is that you two aren’t very close anymore. It was nice of you to send flowers but it seems like even though you kind of made up… there are still bad feelings between you two.

I would just let it go and realize you aren’t that good of friends anymore.

Post # 3
275 posts
Helper bee

Aight, to unpack:

Your Bridesmaid or Best Man managed to be in 2 weddings in one day. Odd, but in essence her choice, and in your words – it worked out. 

You said something that IMO probably came across rather rudely (it sounds like it was meant from a better place, but said in a way that didn’t come across well), and the friendship disintigrated farther. 

You’ve made up somewhat from these hurts in the friendship. Still not close friends, I presume? 


Now your hubby is invited to the bach party and you’re not invited to the bachelorette party. 

our friends openly talk about participating and they had no idea we weren’t in the wedding. It’s uncomfortable to talk about and explain to our friends.

– I can agree it’s probably uncomfortable, but explain you weren’t invited and leave it at that. If it bothers you, ask them not to discuss it in front of you. 

I’ve had one of my best friends offer to hang out with me the night they have their parties, but do I have a right to be mad at the bridesmaid, or the friend, or my husband for going even though I’m not invited?

– No, not really. You’re obviously not close friends, and it’s not your party to invite people to. Does it probably suck from your end? Probably! But there’s no point in being mad, since it’s not going to get you invited, and you don’t have a right to be invited. Especially don’t be mad at the BM for going to a bachelorette party of which she is a BM! Nor the friend, just because she got an invite and you didn’t. Perhaps the bach party is a large group shindig and the bachelorette party is a more intimiate affair. This may explain why hubby was invited and you weren’t.

People just think it’s weird neither of us are in the wedding and I avoid telling people because I don’t want to stir anything up.

– Everyone’s got an opinon about everyone else’s wedding. There may be many reasons you’re not in the wedding, and it may have nothing necessarily to do with you. 


I’d move on, and if you want to revive the friendship more after the wedding, more power to you. But it’s really not worth raising a stink about it now. You don’t have a right to be invited to a party or involved in the wedding. 

Post # 4
1185 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

You need to assign names to people in this post because this is way too confusing 

Post # 7
1191 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Yes you should be.

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