- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
I have five people in my wedding party, one being my cousin. When I was choosing my bridal party I did not automatically include her as I know she is very irresponsible and never has any money. I am having a destination wedding and it is expensive to begin with. Her and I are the closest to each other than any one else in the family. Not that her not having money should have any effect on anything, but it wouldn’t be fair to the other girls who do put out the money for the festivities. She cried and complained until I agreed to let her be a part. When I did she asked how much it would cost for her to be a part of it and I high balled it, so she wouldn’t have any surprises.
I had my shower recently, and the cousin did not participate at all. She “borrowed” money from a family member to pay her portion (she also “borrowed the money for her whole trip from a friend), then scrutinized the other bridal party members to make sure she wasn’t being ripped off. The others took care of the favors, games etc. She also sat in the corner the whole time and didn’t socialize with anyone, which really made me feel bad.
Then comes the bachelorette party. She doesn’t have money to attend, which it is just a dinner and drinks. Now I feel terrible! I always end up spotting her the money for things and this time I am not doing it. She was given over a year, and knew the party would eventually come. I can’t help but feel so upset. I know the purpose of bridesmaids is not so much what they do for you, but to stand next to you on your special day, but I feel like compared to the others she got a free ride the whole time and I feel as if she doesn’t care so much as to participate in my festivities, but rather to make sure she has some spotlight (She told my mother she refused to only be a guest as she would be embarrassed).
Does anyone have any feedback?